He is too well-behaved

Chapter 39. Will you get married? Will you have children?

　　Shen Gusi was in great pain.

　　It's not that he doesn't like physical contact. If it were in the past, he would definitely want to be closer and closer to Xu Jiashen.

　　But it's been three years.

　　In the three years that are neither long nor short, I would think of it from time to time in the beginning, but gradually I thought about it less and less, almost to the point of putting the past in a box and sealing it up. If I didn't touch it, it would gradually fade away.

　　Shen Gu thought that as long as time was long enough, one day he would completely stop thinking about it.

　　But when Xu Jiashen appeared, he seemed like a completely different person. He could only vaguely find shadows of the past in some of his actions. It was the Xu Jiashen who was familiar to him, yet strange to him.

　　Make Shen Gusi scared.

　　The fear that I might become out of control again and the thumping sound of my heartbeat is a wake-up call.

　　"I think... it's still a little too crowded."

　　Shen Gusi twisted his body uncomfortably, which not only successfully brought the two people closer together, but also caused a stir.

　　"Didn't you like to hold me while sleeping?"

　　Xu Jiashen's hand slowly passed over Shen Gusi's waist and held Shen Gusi's hand.

　　His thin body seemed even more fragile in his arms, even thinner than it had looked at first.

　　Xu Jiashen frowned, complaining in his tone, "Why are you losing weight again? Are you too busy taking care of this little girl to take care of yourself?"

　　"No, it's my fault. It has nothing to do with Lulu."

　　Shen Gusi would not tell Xu Jiashen that his health was almost broken.

　　Giving birth is a very painful thing, let alone a special case like Shen Gusi's.

　　Due to the differences in the body structures of men and women, surgery is not only difficult for doctors, but also a double torture for Shen Gusi, both mentally and physically.

　　In the month after Lulu was born, Shen Gusi fell into a state of extreme self-loathing and despair.

　　He smashed all the mirrors in the house, refused to see anyone or go out, and vomited out almost all the food he ate after taking two bites. The scar on his stomach made him wrap himself up tightly even in the summer when the temperature was over 30 degrees and the air conditioner was not turned on.

　　Afraid of the light, afraid of being exposed, Shen Gusi felt that anyone who spoke in front of him was mocking him, no matter whether they were talking about him or not.

　　The morbid psychology made Shen Gusi live in a daze every day. He began to lose his appetite, and when it was serious, he was only willing to drink one glass of water a day, just because he felt the loose flesh in his abdomen.

　　He was like an ant living in the shadows, ready to be stepped on and killed at any time.

　　Finally, with the company of Lulu and Xiao Qi, Shen Gusi finally came out of it little by little.

　　Looking back now, those days seem like they were just a century ago.

　　Shen Gusi fell into a daze unconsciously. He slept less than five hours for two consecutive days, which made Shen Gusi feel tired. Finally, he slowly closed his eyes and fell asleep.