Halcyon

The One Who Can't (And Never Will)

(Her Perspective)

I read his messages, one by one,
Fingers hovering—what have I done?
Not cruel, not cold, just stuck in place,
Trapped in silence, lost in space.

He sends, he waits, he always tries,
His words a net, his hope a tide.
I see them pile, I let them be,
Unread, unseen, but haunting me.

I type a word—backspace, erase,
What could I say to make this break?
A "thank you" once, a nod before,
Yet now they build, they beg for more.

I should say something, I should end,
But how do you kill the love of a friend?
How do you turn without being cruel?
How do you fight when silence rules?

Each time he nears, my feet retreat,
Each time he stays, my heart repeats—

Let this stop. Let him go.
It's too much now. He needs to know.
I can't have him in a dry hope,
And, oh, how I hate him and his hope.

Not hate for him—no, not that way,
But hate for the weight I bear each day.
The weight of knowing, the weight of guilt,
The silent walls that we have built.

I don't want to be cruel, I don't want to break,
But how much more can my ribs take?
Every time I turn, he's already there,
His eyes, his hands, his quiet care.

His eyes—God, his eyes—they light so fast,
As if I'm a wish he's sure will last.
As if I am more than I know I am,
As if I could ever hold his hand.

It is suffocating.

To be the sun to someone's sky,
When all I want is to drift, pass by.
To be the fire to someone's night,
When I have no warmth, no spark, no light.

He should know. He should be bro-zoned.
Yet I stay back, counting my breaths,
Swallowing words, biting regret.

If I speak, will it be too late?
Will he break? Will he hate?

I turn rude, hoping he moves away.
Yet, I don't want to be cruel, or a bad friend.
But I just don't know how to make this end.

Unread messages, piling high,
His patience stretching towards the sky.
He should know. He should let go.
But how do you teach a heart to say no?

I wish I could scream, make it all clear,
But the words refuse to surface here.
So I step back, I shift, I fade,
Praying time will have me saved.

Unread messages, a burden deep,
A drowning love I cannot keep.
Not silence meant to break his soul,
But silence hoping he finally lets go.

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