Interesting Encounter

Chapter forty one

Percy

I can not believe Nico.  How does he not realize this, when all the rest of us can see it? He's so sad and he doesn't even know it, which is double the sad. I want him to be happy, but he hasn't even realized he's said yet. He just worries to much he's making me worried.

I know that sounds weird, but it's hard it's explain. He's just so caring, but I don't know if he cares about himself enough. He just thinks he doesn't matter, and he does matter. He matters so much to me, he rocks my world. But he doesn't even care, not about himself anyway

I'm worried about him, but I probably need to be a little more gentle or whatever. I just want him to be happy, and he's not happy, I don't care what he says he's not. It's not hard to tell, actually, he's not very good at hiding it... But I guess he doesn't even know.

It's sad, it really is. But, you know, if I can help I will help. Nico will be okay, and I'm hoping just because I say the words that they're true. I think he alway felt like an outsider in our little gang. Like looking threw an outside window into other peoples lives. I don't think he considered that Reyna leaving might effect him, because when you think he about it, he has even less people then the rest of us. Everyone seems to leave him, I think his subconscious knows that even if he doesn't.

But not everyone will leave, and it's okay to cry if they do. Hazel won't leave him, Bianca won't leave him, and I certainly won't leave him. But I just need to get him to see that. He's not alone anymore. It used to be just him, but it's not anymore. Where there was one, there is now two.

Maybe we should go out sometime. But intense to be perfect. I need to show him that I care. I really care. He needs to know I love him, just how much how much I love him. Because if not love, I don't know what can help him.

But how do you tell someone you love them, and you will always love them and want to be with them forever, that they never have to be alone until the day you die? I don't know, I'll figure something out. Maybe I should talk to Annabeth or Leo...

I make myself laugh sometimes. Why would I ask Leo?! Leo, of all people... I shook my head and laughed. Leo, I could not ask Leo, he'd probably say "You should go live in a cave wait to years then come back with a cave beard and tell Nico you love him"

Now, I love Leo, but his answer to most problems involves either running away and living in a cave or burning a house down and, well, running away. Maybe that's where Reyna got the idea, maybe Annabeth was right, and we are all really bad influences  on each other...

Nawh. Influence or no influence it was Reyna's decision and she made it. Her journey to free herself from the binds that hold her back, to search for her absolute distinction. But in her quest, every time she found herself she lost a bit of us. And her biggest step yet, freeing herself from her judgmental family, she finally let us go.

I just don't think we've let her go yet. Not yet. She said she might come back, maybe. So let's sit here in this perfect storm of feelings, and drink to the slim chance of our friendships recovery. But I'm scared. I'm scared of letting her go. And the fear is like vultures swooping in and eating me to my extinction. 

But I don't have to be afraid, I have others. I have other people. I need to let Nico know he has me. Because in his arms,  I never feel that afraid. With him by my side, the vultures runs there own extinction follows seconds behind them.

But for him to be by my side all the way, he needs to know I'm by his. How can I let him know I will be by his side for all eternity, that I'll never leave him. How can I promise him, I'm his, for now and forever. Until the day I die, I'm his and only his.

Maybe you can't. Maybe you can't let people know that, but you have to trust them to trust you that you'll always be there. Trust is like a promise, right? Trust can be forever, trust can be for eternity. But but I can't give him trust, he already has my trust. I'd trust him with my life.

I need him to know, I want to be his, forever. But how can I tell him, tell him that I want to be with him until it's physically impossible and then forever after that? There's more then one answer to these questions, and it's pointing me in a crooked line.

But you know, I can do it. I'll figure out what to do for Nico. Maybe I could buy him something. But what object can you buy for someone that symbolizes your ever lasting love for them? I could be cheesy, and learn to play guitar and write a love song...  

Ugh, all this thinking is giving me a headache. Maybe I should just go watch some mindless cartoons and  veg for a while. Nico would probably like that. Ugh. Nico. I wonder what else he would like. What I could do for him to make him know how much I like him.

I don't know, I should just let my brain go blank and just forget it. I'll ask Annabeth or something. I turned on the tv and started flipping threw channels watching one show for 10 minuets or so then skipping to the next. Eventually, I came across this wedding show. The couple  in the show was so cute and happy, they defiantly knew that they would never leave each other. And then, I was hit by a stroke of genius. I know what to do for Nico.

I'll get him a ring.