THE BAD GUYS IN: raising princess

Operation: Matchmaker

The outdoor cafeteria was buzzing with chatter, the scent of freshly cooked food hanging in the warm afternoon air. Students sat at the metal picnic tables, some eating, others catching up on the latest gossip. But Princess and her friends were far too entertained by their own conversation to notice the rest of the school.

Princess sat at the table, flicking her tail as she leaned in, a mischievous grin playing on her lips. Her white fur gleamed under the sunlight, and her pink eyes sparkled with amusement. She was dressed in a bright pink turtleneck sweater underneath a black denim romper dress, paired with white stockings and brown boots. The small pink choker around her neck jingled slightly from the little silver bell attached to it.

"Okay, okay, you guys are gonna love this one," she said, struggling to hold back laughter. "So, one time, Piranha had to use the bathroom, right? No big deal—except he somehow managed to fall into the toilet!"

There was a brief pause before her friends exploded into laughter.

"What?! Are you serious?" Kira nearly choked on her drink.

Laura was practically in tears. "How does that even happen?!"

Princess smirked, swishing her tail. "I have no idea! But it took Wolf, Snake, and Shark to get him out!"

Claudine shook her head in disbelief. "That little guy is living proof that common sense is not universal."

The group continued laughing, each of them picturing the ridiculous image of three grown criminals struggling to pull a very stuck and panicked Piranha out of a toilet.

But before the conversation could go any further, a hesitant voice spoke up from behind them.

"Uh... Princess?"

The laughter died instantly. The girls turned to see Mystery August, standing there with his hands stuffed into his pockets. The jackal had shaggy golden-brown fur and mismatched eyes—one amber, the other a cloudy blue. He shifted uncomfortably under their stares, his posture stiff as if he expected them to yell at him.

Claudine's ears flattened as she stood up, crossing her arms. "What do you want, Mystery?" Her tone was sharp, and her eyes narrowed. "You've got a lot of nerve showing up here after what Bowser did to Princess."

Mystery flinched, his ears lowering. "I—I know, okay? I'm not here to cause problems. I know what Bowser did was messed up. I told him it was a bad idea, but he wouldn't listen."

Princess flicked her ears forward, studying him closely. He looked... guilty.

"Hold on, Claudine. Let's hear him out."

Claudine shot her a look, but she sighed and sat back down, still glaring at Mystery.

Princess tilted her head. "Why'd you even hang out with Bowser, Lewis, and Viggo in the first place?"

Mystery sighed, rubbing the back of his neck. "At first, I thought they were just some guys who liked to have fun. But the longer I hung out with them, the more I realized how bad they really were. After what happened to you, I was done. I stopped talking to them completely."

Claudine scoffed. "And we're just supposed to believe that?"

Mystery nodded earnestly. "I mean it. I don't want anything to do with them anymore."

Princess could tell he was being honest.

"Alright, I believe you. But why are you here?"

Mystery hesitated before blurting out, "I need your help."

The girls exchanged glances.

"With what?" Princess asked, raising a brow.

Mystery swallowed hard, looking extremely uncomfortable. "I... I have a crush on Briar Thorn."

For a moment, there was complete silence.

Then—

"Wait—Briar Thorn? The Briar Thorn?!" Laura nearly dropped her drink.

Mystery nodded, his ears twitching awkwardly.

Kira let out a low whistle. "Wow. You sure aim high, huh?"

"Yeah, seriously," Claudine said, shaking her head. "She's the goth queen of this school. The last guy who asked her out got a death glare so intense he transferred schools."

"I know," Mystery groaned. "But I really like her. I just... don't know how to talk to her."

Princess tilted her head, a smirk creeping onto her face. "So, let me get this straight—you want us to help you ask out one of the most mysterious, hardest-to-impress girls in school?"

Mystery nodded desperately. "Yeah. Please?"

Princess exchanged a glance with her friends.

Kira tapped her chin. "Well... this could be fun."

Laura grinned. "I do love a good challenge."

Claudine sighed dramatically. "Fine, but only because this will be hilarious to watch."

Princess turned back to Mystery, her smirk widening.

"Alright. We're in. Operation: Matchmaker is officially on."

Step One: Learning the Target

The first step in their plan was gathering intel. If they were going to help Mystery impress Briar, they needed to know everything about her.

The girls spent the next day carefully observing Briar from a distance. She was always dressed in dark clothing, usually some combination of black fishnets, platform boots, and heavy eyeliner. Her long black hair had streaks of violet, and she almost always had a book in her hands.

Princess leaned against a locker, watching her from afar. "Alright, so we know she likes horror movies, heavy metal, and poetry."

"She also tutors in literature," Kira added.

"And she's a huge fan of Edgar Allan Poe," Laura said, flipping through her notes.

Mystery groaned. "Great. She likes smart guys. I'm doomed."

"Not necessarily," Princess mused, tapping her chin. "We just have to work with what we've got."

Step Two: The Makeover

The next day, they worked on Mystery's appearance. If he wanted Briar to notice him, he needed a look that stood out.

Princess sat him down while Laura applied some light makeup—just enough to make his features pop.

Claudine crossed her arms. "Okay, clothes-wise, we need something dark but not too try-hard. Think 'brooding but approachable.'"

Kira smirked. "I have just the outfit."

Step Three: The Grand Gesture

After some coaching on how to hold a conversation and not embarrass himself, the big moment arrived.

Mystery, now dressed in a fitted black jacket and dark jeans, approached Briar in the library. The girls watched from behind a bookshelf as he cleared his throat.

"Hey, uh... I heard you like Edgar Allan Poe."

Briar raised a brow. "And?"

Mystery took a deep breath. "I—I found this book of his poems. Thought you might like it." He held out a beautifully bound copy of The Raven and Other Poems.

Briar stared at the book, then at him. Slowly, she smirked.

"Hmph. Not bad, Mystery."

From behind the bookshelf, Princess and her friends fist-pumped. Mission accomplished.

(A request from AlicornNorth )