Prince on the wrong path? (solby)

CHEPTER 60

opening my arms without thinking at all he jumped in my arm hearing his heart beat in his neck it was pounding so fast I closed my eyes wrapping my arms around him trying not to let any emotion come out I do this for him only for him "you will be okay sam you had so much worse and did it" I whispered "please don't leave me" he whispered making me feel sick and dizzy "sam your heard what I said even if you ever forgive me I just can't I will forever hate me for this" he pulled Away looking at me "yes I'm still mad and sad but I forgave you already bc after thinking about it and talking about it I did almost worse yes I dident slap someone but to tell you this and say something like this and in front of everyone was very very unfair but let me at least make one think clear in no way did I ever mean i dident love you, or that everything was fake and stuff and if I dident wanted to get married or prince /king I should have told you way sooner yes nothing of this makes it right what you did but to be honest maybe I had slapped you to if it was reverse bc I would have bin shocked to I don't know why I said this and why there really I don't know I was probably so stressed out from many many days and events that bottled up I wanted to at least apologize for what I did even though it doesn't makes it right but for you to know I mean it I really really do you looked in my eyes while talking but all his sweetness and kindness and heartwarming make me hate me even more how I could do that to the Angel himself "it's okay sam I would never be mad for long I'm just happy you are okay, and you will be okay you are still prince and I won't divorce you so you are save and secure here" colby please I'm begging you I'm really begging don't talk like this please I'm scared he said hugging me his arms tightly around my neck making my body on fire "sam you really should go now I promise you everything will be okay" hearing him start to cry  I closed my eyes feeling the pain in his sobs he pulled Away looking in my eyes but I couldn't I feel so guilty he pulled my chin up making me look at him "I love you" he whispered tears still running down this broke something inside off me free just bursting crying like never before he pulled me in his arms just holding in to me feeling every emotion I had come out my head and heart hurting my body on fire "why do you still love me" I cried "bc you are my husband colby yes what you did was unspeakable but I know that was and is not you and I'm more then sure this also would never happen again yes I'm angry and sad but I love you and you can't go anywhere please, please please I need you please when you or we need time okay if you need professional help also good but please don't leave me you can't and you promised me to never leave me remember " by now crying to" why dident you never tell me you don't want any of that why explode then in front of anyone "I don't know colby I really don't" so you never wanted to married me " I ask he sits up looking at me" of course I did that why I did but not becoming a prince I love you and aways did and I married you for you " sooo you want me to divorce you that you are free from the title" no-no I don't want that I want to stay your husband I really want to "I just looking at him not finding any sentences" do you love me still "he whispered looking at me my throat was so close I  couldn't breathe feeling tears run down my my face feeling myself hyperventilating" hey - hey colby breath - breath with me come on look at me in slowlyy out - in slowly out " I tried to do what he did but it was so hard my head spinning he got up from me pulling me to the ground sitting me down meaning in the chair" look slowly around and tell me 5 things you can see " he said rubbing my back" bed,table, chair, you, carpet "I said still breathing" amazing and now 4 things you can touch "you, the floor, chair, pen" that was laying on the ground "you doing so good now 3 things you can hear" he said "you, the birds,people talking" I said realizing there is something talking in the Castle "that's fantastic colby now 2 things you can smell" he ask "also you and rain" he smiled good and one more 1 thing you can taste " the disgusting red wine still" I smiled seeing him smile to taking my hand " continue breathing you are okay I'm sorry if I overwhelmed you I dident mean to at all" hey no it's okay, it's okay I'm just so overwhelmed from the last 48h I dident calm down 1 min it's not you okay "to your question I love you more then my life if you could tell but I will never forgive me never I can't even look in your eyes I feel like the biggest scumbag in the world"colby please you never did anything at all to me you where always sweet kind caring protective loving "this was a such a overwhelming situation for both of us first married then a few days later the king thing, the ball, the birthday, your mother I sure that all came out and explored when I told you all the things I did I don't believe in the slidest that you are aggressive or abusive colby and I'mnot scared of you or anything if you thing that please don't make you sick from this I believe strongly this was from all the situations bottled up and could have met anyone I mean did you thing about what you all experienced in the last mouth your foot, your mom, the ball, the birthday,the hanging,then the wedding and king thing you dident even had time to breath for a sec please let's try and fix this okay we don't have to go back as if nothing happened but you always told me we got this together right you help me I help you and we help us,we are still married and I want to stay married with you please it was the best day of my life to marrie you we even told my parents who brought you to me we have to be soulmates right " sam I really don't know if I can of course I want to bc I wanted to since I saw you but my guild is eating me alive I really mean that it's not a sorry or a I feel bad no it's eating me inside I looked at him for a sec feeling so much pain" he came closer just hugging me his face in my neck his hands wrapped around my torso  feeling so warm inside again the feeling definitely dident die   "please let's try at least colby please I don't want this marriage and love to be over please please I'm begging you" Sammy I - I " please colby let me help you let's face this together like we said we would I know you feel devastated but I'm not mad at you anymore bc this wasent an I just slap my husband all day think, I love you and I won't give up this marriage colby this is my dream a perfect man wo married me I felt like I'm in a Fairy tale "sammm" yes I did I mean meeting a prince fall in love Marry does that sound like a Fairy tale or not " he said smiling" sam I really love you to and you know that I die without you as you can tell but if you could feel how guilty I feel it's eating me "just give us some time we both experienced so much the last months but we got this together colby you just can't give up do you even know how scared I was you might.... I can't even think about it yes I was angry and hurt but after some talks with the castle and time to think I realize what I did was not right in the slidest as well I heared you dident care about the people there if they heard it was the what I said right " making me nod" im my head I just heared you dident wanted any of that including me it's stupid I know but it sounded like this when you tell someone you dident wanted any of that so you automatically think did he even love me or at least I thought that " colby no I get that of course i would have thought that to that's why I said I probably had slapped you to, please colby let's at least try and save this I don't wanne lose you I really can't I lost everything I had already please I really love you" he looked at me so soft and scared I could tell "okay sam I do my best but I don't know how to life with that" he came closer hugging me