Cyber ~ 5sos

t h i r t y

Isabella's POV

'Luke' I call for about the 12th time in the last few minutes. After seeing everyone out, I wouldn't let myself go. I needed to know what was wrong with Luke.

'Who was that you were hugging tonight at the top of the stairs?' He grits, still walking ahead of me.

'Dylan? What does he have to do with any of this' I reply, growing frustrated. He sighs and turns around.

'What do you think' He bites back.

I search his face for any trace of emotion, but all I see is the same clenched jaw. He's angry.

Suddenly it hits me.

'Don't tell me it's because you're jealous' I laugh.

'Oh yes thats hilarious Belle' He mocks me, pulling open the kitchen door so hard it bounces off the wall behind.

'Luke' I sigh.

'And what about Louis huh? Why did you even come in contact with him, you know how dang-'

'I had no control over it' I stress.

He groans, leaning over the kitchen counter with his head slightly dipped low.

'Why do you keep avoiding me?' I finally ask, looking down at the floor. The party had now died down and everyone had left after Luke's outburst.

'I can't do this' He stutters, daring not to look into my eyes. He stands awkwardly by the kitchen counter, with his hands shoved in his hoodie pockets staring aimlessly around the room as some kind of distraction to the hurtful words he just spoke.

'No' I reply plainly. I walk over to him, standing in between his legs. I try to follow his eyes but they only run away further. 'No, Luke-' I say, holding his face in my hands, the roughness from his slight stubble brushing on my skin. 'Look me in the eyes and tell me you don't want this' I plead, trying not to burst into tears.

'I-' He pauses, as a tear falls from my eye, travelling down my left cheek. He slowly reaches up and stops it in its path with his thumb, stroking across my cheek.

Tears begin to well in his eyes, creating a small pool gathering on his bottom eyelid. I just wanted to take away all of his pain and hurt, I just wanted him to be okay.

His smile quickly fades into a blank expression and he squeezes out of my grasp, walking away. I spin around and chase after him, lightly grabbing onto his forearm, He whips it away and turns to face me.

'You know what no fuck you' he cries angrily, pointing a finger at me.

I'd never seen Luke like this before, it scared me how his mood just flipped constantly, I could get severe whiplash from this.

'Luke, you don't understa-'

'No I do, and it's all my fucking fault. You fucking asshole why are you doing this to me?' He grits, pulling at his hair.

'Doing what?' I cry in despair.

He groans loudly, becoming increasingly angry. Suddenly he flips. 'Making me fall in fucking love with you' he shouts dropping to his knees and practically curling up, tugging at any part of his body he can find.

My whole body freezes instantly and my breath hitches.

'You- you what?' I whisper.

'Yeah' He stresses. 'What a bombshell. Look I'm sorry okay I never meant for this to happen, this wasn't part of the plan I just-'

'What do you mean?' I ask, toying with my hands.

'And you want answers' he whispers. Now I was just certain he was losing his mind.'My god you want answers-' he begins to raise his voice. 'You want answers? They've been hanging around your neck the whole fucking time' he yells hysterically laughing, storming viciously out of his house. My mind was a whirlwind, drawing a dark vortex of sadness and confusion. All I wanted was for Luke to hold me in his arms like he usually did, to whisper sweet nothings into my ear making goosebumps rise on the surface of my skin. I wanted for him to be wrapped around me, with our legs messily intertwined surrounded by blankets and duvets laughing at a stupid sound he made.What I didn't want to be doing was wondering why he left so viscously, why he gritted every single word through his teeth, why he had become so unimaginably repulsed by me. you want answers? They've been hanging around your neck the whole fucking time

My hand lands on the middle of my chest, covering the necklace Luke had bought me all them weeks ago, the dainty little capsule filled with one grain of rice, enclosed around a metal clasp which lay hung in between my collarbones, inches away from my heart.

I pick up the small capsule in between my thumb and fore finger, bringing it closer to my face, yet pulling it far away enough for my eyes to focus on it.

All systems shut down forcefully, as soon as my eyes landed on the writing carved lightly into the grain of rice with black ink.

The one word, which proudly hung on my body at all times, the one word I dreaded to hear, and worst of all, the one word which belonged to the blonde haired blue eyed boy I loved.

The one word.

Ecstacyrush.

. . . . . . . . .

a.n.

how do I even write an authors note to this, anyway people had concern that this was going to be the end when you find out who it is, but its not, thats only half the plot

holy shit anyway, that was intense

Until next time,

Em x