Damaged

Chapter 12

I wake up to see Blair pacing the room. He looked worried..or anxious. I couldn't tell. I looked into his eyes as he caught glance of me, now awake. He walks over to me and places his hands on my shoulders as he looks deep into my eyes. They were brighter than ever and gleaming. I could not tell he was anxious, but for what? "Hey." I said hesitantly, not wanting his tingling touch to end. Every time he touched me it was like a shock going through me, a growing warmth spreading from his touch. My body craved his touch, craved his heat. "Hey guess what?" He says as his voice cracks. Now I could definitely tell he was excited for something. "What is it?" I asked, raising an eyebrow and smiling slightly. "You get to go home today!" He half says, half yells at me. I couldn't help it; I smiled big. "Really?" I say, not believing I get to leave this hell hound finally. "Yes!" He screams and gets up and does a cute little dance. "You are way too cute." I say under my breathe as he leans over and kisses my cheek. "Nope, you are the cute one. I will be back, I'm going to go grab you breakfast so they can release you." "Oh.. Okay.." I say, trailing off, getting lost in disappointment. Why was I so attached to him? I knew I always had a crush on him, but why was this evolving to something so much bigger than a crush? Did I love him? More importantly, did he love me? No that's impossible.. I'm repulsive and hideous. There is no way he could like me..or was there? What am I talking about, it was nothing but simple lust and empathy he felt for me considering I've been in the hospital for almost 4 months straight. I mentally shook myself from these thoughts and glanced around the room, waiting for Blair to return. I lifted my hand and felt my cheek, where his tingling kiss still remained. The cot next to my bed was unmade from where Blair has slept the past four months and the trash can was filled with snack wrappers and empty plastic cups from the cafeteria. The room smelt like hospital; old people, death, and medicine. A smell all to familiar to me. I notice my restraints and the smell getting to me. I start to see the walls cave in and my lungs fill with what seemed to be quick sand. I couldn't breath and the walls were closing in.. Fast. I started to struggle and scream with all the last bit of air I had left. 'Please, blair, come back. Save me. Make me feel safe in your arms.' I thought to myself. No what was I doing, I couldn't lean on him. He wasn't going to stick around. The quicksand filled my lungs, the walls crashed down and I blacked out just as I heard my name leave Blair's mouth in a worry filled scream .

I'm drowning, in my own thoughts and feelings. I look around and my eyes are blurred by water, or was it my tears? I felt weightless and stiff, like I couldn't move. I tried to move, but every inch of me wasn't responding and was aching with pain. I tried to take a deep breath but my lungs filled with water. This was definitely water. I started to caught, suffocating under this... This 'water'. I tried to cry out but made on a small whimper before I started to choke again. My eyes started to see stars and at this point I knew I was purple an blue, suffocating under this unknown water. Was this really how it was going to end? I blinked trying to clear my vision more but when I opened my eyes, the water started turning red and things started floating around. I felt like I was singeing and on fire. I blinked more but my vision went fast and I felt terrible pains all over me. I pushed through the pain and touch my hand on my arm. My own flesh was burning off, I was in acid. I tried to scream but the disgusting taste of the acid made me panic and I couldn't even hear the whimper that escaped. 'My last sound, of my last breathe' I thought to myself. 'How pathetic' I thought. I was in so much pain I went numb. Someone must have heard my whimper after all because before i knew it hands were pushing through the acid. But they weren't saving me. No they weren't. Before I knew what was happening the hands were around my neck grabbing me tightly, closing off any bit of air I had left. I felt a tug as my head reeled into a different universe and I though I blacked out but I didnt, not yet. The hands pulled me up out of the acid by my neck and I was free. Sitting in a field of grass, unharmed and safe. I gasped for breathe as I looked up and saw a rainbow. Where the hell did the acid go? Where did my burned off flesh go? Why am I still alive? The though made my head reel and my stomach feel nauseated while my skin crawled. I laid back in the grass hoping that would help. I still didn't know where I was but next thing I know I see Blair's head over me. "Hey buddy. What's wrong, you look a little...scared" he says with a hint of worry in his eyes. "I was just.. Bad dream, that's all." I heard the birds chirping and I felt almost weightless looking into Blair's warm eyes. "Oh" he said with a big grin coming across his face. What was he smiling at? Then I saw it. Blair had a gun and it was pointed straight at my head. "I always thought you were a waste of my time. Nothing but a lust, nothing but a place holder." He said those words as they hit me like lightening strikes. I started to shake with that look on his face and I knew.. "Blair please.." But before I could finish my sentence he pulled the trigger. The next thing I see is all black. Then there is a small light, I start to follow it. It got so bright I had to shield my eyes but when I get really close, I see them. My mum and pa, sitting at a dinning room table, laughing and reading the newspaper together. Where was i? Heaven? No that can't be.. Heaven doesn't exist. But yet, there they were, being happy as ever together. I started to walk towards them but the closer I got the farther they were. I started running as fast I could in hopes of catching them but they kept getting farther and farther away. I saw them happy, but I could experience it myself with them. I fell to my knees, giving up. But the floor was soft and I started falling. I started falling for what seemed like forever. I was crying as I fell, watching the tears float up because I was falling faster than they were. I saw my mom and dad waving at me as I hit the ground..hard.

I wake up, arching my back, practically jumping out of bed. I was bawling my eyes out and breathing hard. I was gasping for air that seemed like it wasn't there. I felt so small. I looked around. I was in my house, in my room. I started bawling my eyes out and having a panic attack. I couldn't breathe, I had no space. I needed to get out of here.. Now. I started running..or walking, I couldn't really tell. I opened my door and stumbled out. I was still crying, shaking, and gasping for air as I turned the corner for the door. I saw Blair running at me with open hands to catch me as my knees gave out and I was falling. I felt like I was falling forever and ever. But this time, I didn't hit the ground..

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Sorry it has been so long guys, I have been super busy reading other stories on here and sorta forgot about mine. My apologies! I hope you like Levi's fucked up dreams. And I hope you enjoyed this thrilling chapter. More to come, keep reading!

Xoxo-Megs