Damaged

Chapter 9

"Hey there big guy. How are you feeling?" A familiar voice ask me. "I was so worried about you. I thought you weren't going to make it out. Silly you. Everything is going to be okay handsome." Who was this? The voice was so familiar, so close but yet so far away. I try to blink my eyes open but they place their hands over my eyes. "No no not. Not yet. Wouldn't want you to get any thoughts in your head." Who was this? What were they hiding from me? The the hell is going on? The skin smells sweet like honey sickles but Like a man in the softest way. I could feel rough skin of hard working hands on my face. Why was this so familiar. Then it hit me.. "Blair?" I choke out, not so sure if I should be talking right now. My throat was dry and rough. My voice sounded almost as if it wasn't mine. "Haha silly, you got me!" He lifted his hands and the first thing I notice was his gorgeous smile. But something was unsettled about it. I look further upon his face and notice his eyes; red and puffy. Almost as if he was crying. He must have noticed my deep concentration because he turned his face away and continued talking. "How are you feeling? You look a lot better than before." I notice Blair has his hand on mine. Was this some kind of sick joke? What the fuck was going on, I want answers now! "Blair where am i?" I say in a hushed tone. "Shhh, now isn't the time to worry, go to sleep." He says as he fades off. I notice him press the nurse button on the bed. I look around. I'm in a hospital bed, in a hospital room. But it isn't an ordinary hospital room, it looks almost more... Permanent. There is dead flowers on the table across my view and blairs bag filled with things in the chair. There was a cot next to my bed and of course I put two and two together. "We're you.. Staying here?" I ask confused. "Oh don't be silly. Shh shh. Everything will be okay." Why does he keep saying that? I start to focus on his gorgeous face and get memorized. I notice his lips moving but I don't catch what he says. Next thing I know a doctor is walkin in, looking at me with worry filled eyes. "Hello levi. How are you feeling?" His voice was deep and rusty; strained a little. "I'm feeling fine but what is goi.." "Move your toes for me?" I hesitate and shoot him a confused look. I start to wiggle my toes back and forth. "Doc. Is there a reason why I am here at thi.." "And raise your arms and touch your fingers to your palms?" I'm starting to get pissed. I raise my arms, with a little bit of pain I start to touch my thumb to all of my fingers. "What the fuck is going on?"

"Levi , please." Blair says to me and rubs his thumb across my arm.

"You are doing well. Vitals are gaining back normal. White blood cells are repairing. Fluid out of the lungs. Heart is pumping strong. You are one lucky guy, levi" the doctor informs me. "You are so beyond lucky you had your good friend over at your house or this could have been a sticky situation" he says with a smirk and a small chuckle to himself. He stands up and quickly goes to my feet. He buckles them up in restraints and moves to my wrist and does the same. "Okay, it's time." It's time? For what? A woman who I didn't notice from the other side of the room walks over. She has a three inch needle in her hand and walks next to me . "It going to be okay sweet heart, you will only feel a pinch." She jabs the needle into my neck and it feels like a nasty bee sting. She starts to inject me with this fluid. I start feeling my heart slow down and my breathe get shallow. I feel like I'm drowning. I try to scream but there is no air in my lungs to make a sound. I look over at Blair begging for help but he just sits there holding my hand, crying. I've never seen someone so beautiful cry; someone so perfect. I feel tingles start from my toes slowly moving to my knees. I try to move my toes but I lost all control. The tingle moves across my body and it gets painful. I start screeching with all of my air as I try to endure what is happening. What IS happening? What are they doing to me? By the time I notice Blair tighten his grip on my hand I start to feel the tingle over my chest. I can't feel anything. When it gets to my neck I start to feel tears leave my eyes. The tingle over takes my whole body and I start going in a daze. I see Blair lean over and kiss my forehead. Is this it? What is happening. Blair pulls out his pocket knife. Is he going to free me? Cut my restraints? Let me go? He starts to sob more and more he reaches over my neck and i see it happen in his eye reflection but I don't feel a thing. My neck was cut and All I could see is the blood pouring all over the bed. Then he leans over my chest and jabs me with the knife. Over and over again. The nurse and doctor start to laugh and Blair joins them. I start to feel my eyes roll back in my head when I hear a faint sob. No one was crying now; they were laughing. Was I hearing myself? Was I hearing my soul start to cry? Was this the end?

I got a cold chill and opened my eyes. I observe my surroundings. I'm drenched in sweat an out of breathe. Clearly I was struggling before I woke. Thank god it was a dream. The room is the same as it was in the nightmare. I try to pull my legs and feet up but cant. Either I was numb or my restraints were on. I felt something in my hand. I look at it in deep thought. One hand held my railing of the bed in a tight grip. the other held.. It held Blair's hand. Blair's hand? I felt his rough, almost familiar skin. I looked at him and he looked at me and smiled. His smile made me feel a sense of relief. I felt like this has happened before, and it had, only in my dream. He looked deep into my eyes like he was looking for something. When I looked back at him his eyes looked empty. Emotionless. What was wrong? What happened? Did I do something? I don't remember. An then it hit me.. The pills, the bottles. The suicide attempt. Why am I still alive? Why am I damned on this earth? The rush of all those emotions from earlier came back and I started getting dizzy. I started feeling myself fade out right as I heard Blair speak. "Hey mnow, you can't go back to bed. I haven't seen your gorgeous eyes in almost three months. Surely you aren't STILL tired." He rubbed my hand, a reassuring rub. He hasn't seen my eyes.. In almost three months? What did that mean? I couldn't process anything, I started to fade out. I remember a disappointed look on his face as everything goes black..

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Woah. Can I say powerful? That is the only world that comes to mind when I try to describe this chapter. What the hell is happening? Blair is there?

#confused

This will be a great story guys. Keep reading (:

Xoxo- Megs .