Damaged

Chapter 26

    I shook my had, thinking it was crazy I was thinking Liz lied to me. She stepped out of the room and walked into the living room where i was. She was wearing a nice red blouse with black pants and red high heels. She, of course, looked stunning. "have you lost weight?" I threw the question at her. I didn't really think she had lost weight but she seemed like she needed cheering up. She smiled brightly and began to say "no, I haven't. But thanks babe. Now i have to go. Behave yourself. I will be home around 6pm tonight." And with a turn of her heels she was walking towards the door. "I love you" She called back at me. "You too babe" I laid back on the couch and realized i had a massive headache. I sat up and walked to the kitchen. I pulled out Advil and took 3. I closed the door and walked to the fridge. Beer filled the bottom selves. I reached for one and froze. I didn't need beer to be happy when i was alone. Plus, with my crazy ass dream, drinking might not be the smartest thing. I raised my hand and reached for a bottle of water, instead. I turned around and saw my reflection in the mirror. My hair was long enough to reach my eye lashes. My face looked exhausted and so did the hunch of my shoulders. I dragged myself to the couch where i sat down. I turned on the stereo and blasted Memphis May fire. I love bands with deep lyrics. I felt myself leaning in and out of consciousness but i didn't mind; i needed sleep. The music soon consumed me and all my worries just slipped away. 

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     I was walking towards a big bond fire.People were everywhere like ants at a picnic. I scanned the crowd for Brett but didn't have any luck. I walked closer to the fire pits, fixing my jacket and adjusting my bracelets. The salt in the air was soothing but the chatter of everyone irritated me. It smelled like alcohol and vomit. great. I turned my head towards the sound of Brett singing to Taylor Swift. I walked towards him and got him off the roof of the truck. "thanks for waiting for me, dick." i say to him as i knee him in the balls. "got the shit?" I ask, laughing to myself. he hands me 3 pills from his pocket; Ecstasy. I smile and throw my head back as i swallow them dry. he regains his smile and begins singing again. He starts to walk off but i don't follow him. Instead I look around and notice Blair, off to himself. he kinda looks really fucked up so i walk towards him. "Hey, Blair." I say, nice and calm. "Why the hell must you always be around me?" He seems angry but in his eyes i can see that he wants to be closer. I take a step forward and so does he. He grabs my wrist and takes me behind the truck so no one can see us. "I just wanted to check on you." I reply, honestly. He rolls his eyes, butterflies fill my stomach. "thanks, I'm doing fine." He snaps, but lets his cute voice slip through the harshness. I smile and step toward him and he mocks my movement. I reach up and place the back of my finger tips on his cheek, and drag them down his neck. I find my hands on his chest, exploring his body and he does the same. I Lean in closer, ready for his soft lips to touch mine; ready for fire to explode between us. "Levi! Levi, come the fuck on! We have to go! We have to go, now!" I hear Brett's voice blast through my thoughts. fuck you Brett, fuck you!  I give Blair a sincere look and rush towards Brett. He grabs my wrist and runs to the car, dragging me behind. We get in and start driving fast, leaving this party. People are scrambling everywhere. About a block from the beach, cops are on their way, rushing towards the party. No wonder we had to leave. "If i didn't find you when i fucking did, we would have been dead!' Brett protests at me.I grow angry and yelled back. 'I almost kissed him. Goddamn it, Levi! I almost kissed Blair!" He sighs loud and continues. "You would be in jail if we didn't leave." I roll my eyes and sit back. we drive for what seems like hours until I pull up to my house. 

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I feel cloudy, but i sit up from the couch. I rub my head and try to think of everything that i just saw. Why was i having these kinds of dreams. I thought Brett was in jail, and Blair is some random dude. Why did i try to kiss him? surely its all my imagination, but i have a constant voice in my head telling me its real. Liz wouldn't lie to me so i know it is all just a dream, and nothing more. I open my water and take a swig before i glance at my watch. it was a little after 5 and i was getting hungry. i walked into the kitchen and glanced in the cabinets. I pulled out some things and started cooking fried chicken and mac and cheese for supper. Right as the timer went off for the mac and cheese, Liz walked into the door. "smells good, honey." She yells from the front room. She walks in with a smile on her face with instantly disappears once she see's me. I looked dead. "Sweetheart, are you okay? you look exhausted. Is everything okay?" I could see the concern in her eyes but something seemed.. off about it. It hurt but i placed a smile on my face while clearing my throat. "I'm fine babe. how was work?" I stir the cheese in and set out plates. i sit down at the table and so does Liz. "Work was work. how was your day, dear?" She gave a faint smile that was unsettling. I shivered and glanced at my food, mindlessly picking at it. 'I had another bad dream, but besides that, it was good.' I Lied, but she didn't need to know how real these dreams were. I placed a smile on my face and began to eat more. "I'm sorry. I wonder why you are having nightmares." her soft voice, piercing me in the wrong way. "They aren't nightmares." i snapped. It was.. real, almost. It felt real. My skin burned when i woke where Blair once was. I had feelings for Blair and I didn't even know how i knew him. I shuttered and continued to eat my dinner. Liz just looked down the whole time and with that, the conversation for the night was killed. i cleaned up from dinner and walked into the bedroom. Liz was laying on the bed, watching cartoons, as usual. I laid next to her and pulled her closer. We watched cartoons in silence until we fell asleep.

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His memories! 

xoxo- Megs