The Rant (One Direction)

Chapter 32

Harry's POV

"It's a bit complicated, really." I started, laughing nervously and scratching the back of my neck. "I've.. Well, I've changed. More than I should have." I sighed, biting my lip and looking down at my hands, trying to control myself. The angry side, the dark side kept trying to come out and show itself, but I wouldn't allow it. "I-I.. I don't know how to put it." I admitted truthfully. It was hard to put it all into words, when I tried to explain it, nothing came to my mind. It all sounded wrong. It just didn't fit with the situation correctly. "I've.." I sighed. "I've been getting.. Really.. Angry lately. Even at the smallest things. It sets me off and it makes me want to punch a hole in the wall. Which I have done." I said, flexing out my hand since it was quite sore from punching things. Pleasant. No one said a word, allowing me to talk.

"And whenever I get angry like that, I don't know what I'm doing." I continued, running a hand through my hair then busying myself as I played with one of the rings on my fingers. "It's like.. I don't have control of myself anymore. The only thing I want to do is hurt someone. I wasn't in my right mind when I came here, Niall, and I strongly apologize for that. I was just thinking about what happened, and it set me off. Knowing that I might lose her," I paused, looking over at Katerina. "It tears me apart. I don't like knowing there is a possibility she'll leave me, that she'll move on to someone better. Someone who doesn't have this problem. Someone like you." I said, directing the last part to Niall, but I didn't break eye contact with Katerina; it almost seemed impossible.

"Harry," Niall said after I'd finished, and I finally broke the stare between Kat and I, looking at him. "I think you need to understand something." He sighed. "Kat here, she's.. Mate, she's head over heels in love with you, as cheesy as it sounds. And I highly respect that she is yours. I don't know what happened to me on that stage, I wasn't thinking straight. I kind of just did it. And I'm sorry if that puts a strain on your relationship, because that's the last thing I would want to do." He said sincerely, glancing at Katerina.

"I appreciate that, but it's not up to me or you." I said, biting my lip. "It's up to her to choose who she wants to be with." I spoke, and noticed that the others decided to let us have our own little private conversation.

"I.." Katerina started to say, letting out a somewhat frustrated sigh. "I can't choose. I don't want to hurt anybody." She said, frowning. "And I.. I'm in love with you both!" She said, shaking her head quickly, slightly in confusion. "I mean.. I have this weird feeling around Niall. It's like we just.. Click." She said confusedly, then she slapped a hand over her mouth as soon as she said it. "No, no, no. I'm not implying anything by saying that." She rushed quickly, but I was already out the door, into the pouring rain, having taken the emergency exit.

I just needed to cool off before I did anything I would highly regret, but she didn't seem to get that hint since I saw her running after me. It was almost midnight, so of course it was dark, and thunder lit up the sky, the rain soaking me in seconds.

"Harry!" She called, and I stopped, turning around to face her outside of the hotel around the back of the building.

"Kat, go back inside, you're going to get sick. I just need a minute." I said, shaking my head, but it was incredibly hard to hear each other. She was shouting something at me to try and make me hear over the downpour, but I just wouldn't listen to her. After a few minutes I just told her I needed some time and started to walk off, but was taken aback when she jumped onto my back and clinged onto me for life.

"Do you think I'm really going to let you go after you were mugged less than twenty four hours ago?" She asked, childishly clinging onto me, and I couldn't help but smile and laugh at her actions.

"Kat," I said, sighing a bit at how she was trying to make the situation less serious; it was so like her. "Kat, come on, I need to go." I said, eventually managing to pry her off of my back. I faced her, looking down at her. "I promise I'll be back, I just need a little while."