One sick love story

My murderous thoughts

Authors note:
Hi everyone, I guess this message is like a warning. This scene is quite graphic, and may be unpleasant or disturbing for some of the younger readers. I have spent a lot of time on this part, I've been planning it from a long time ago for a very long time. It's a very intense and upsetting part, but it's certainly worth reading.
Warning you also, the point of view does change frequently, so try not to get too confused. But other than that... This is one of my favourite parts, and I hope you enjoy it!! :)

--

People have tried, but there's nothing anyone can do to save me. To help me. To do anything.
I'm terminal.
I'm a grenade waiting to explode.
I'm an inevitable human of death. I'm going to die. I will die.
And there's nothing anyone can do about it.
They try to help, they really do, but they just don't understand. It just makes things worse. I got discharged from hospital yesterday and I've been assigned hospice care nurses but it's not true. It can't happen, it just can't!

I have made up my mind. This is the only solution. The only way to escape Cancer. I won't let it beat me, I won't!
Cancer isn't going to be the thing to kill me...

I pick up the phone, and dial Ben's number.

It goes to speaker, so I leave him a message.

--

Ben's POV:

I walk over to my phone where I notice darcy has left me a message. I sit down on my bed and carefully listen to every word she has to say.

" Hi, I really don't know how to say this ben... So I won't. All I have to say is, things are just too much, I'm going to die, I will die, I will die, and I... I have to say goodbye, I couldn't do it face to face, I'm so sorry ben., I'm sorry, but please don't try and stop me" and that's the end of the message.
The most ghastly thoughts scurry through my mind, she's up to something. And I know what drastic things Darcy is capable of.
She's just been diagnosed with terminal cancer, now there's only one way to escape.
I sprint to my phone as I come to a realisation of what's about to happen.
I ring darcy "Darcy pick up, pick up." I scream.

Darcy's PoV:

I'm gonna do it, there's no reason why I shouldn't, there's no reason to be living, there's no reason to be breathing.
I've got to sort things out before the world completely crashes down on me. I'm being confined so there's no way to escape, suffocating whilst breathing my own air.
I panter up and down the room, sweating with fear and determination. Questions battling eachother in my mind, it's wrong, but it's right, it's wrong, it's right, but it always comes back to one conclusion.
I scrape my sharp nails roughly down my face, causing me to bleed. I fall rapidly down to the floor in a flood of tears, just screaming and tearing myself apart inside, desperately wanting it all to end.
Then... The phone rings. It's my concerned boyfriend who's doing exactly what I told him not to do, no one... Is changing my mind. And I mean no one.
I don't deny his call but I refuse to pick up. I drag myself up from the bloody, and tear stained floor and run into the bathroom.
I stare at myself in the mirror in disgust. Who wants this in their life? Who needs this in their life? The Cancer's eating me up inside, it's turned me into a monster , I'm destroying my family, I don't deserve to live.
I grab all the pills I can find from my medicine cabinet.
It's ironic , the things that are used to preserve your life also have the power to kill you.

Ben's pov:
"Come on Darcy don't do this now, please just pick up. "
I ring again but still no answer.
"Darcy, please. Oh dammit Darcy just pick up the bloody phone."
If she's doing what I think she's doing then there's no one there to stop her.
So I grab my phone and immediately ring her mother.
"Ben what is it? I'm busy."
"I don't know what to do, I think something's wrong with darcy, she left me this message , and I've only just got it and-"
"Ben what's going on?"
"I think Darcy's trying to kill herself."
"Oh my god." She switches off the phone and I sprint to my car.

I speed to her house with anticipation.
Me and her mum arrive straight away and we launch ourselves inside the house.
"Darcy!" We both start screaming.

Darcy's POV:

I anxiously sit on my bed with my legs shaking furiously, holding the 4 boxes of pills in my hand. I'm emotionally beaten up inside, I throw myself around trying to fight against my murderous thoughts. This causing several bruises and cuts and a heavy bleed pouring from my noise. The scratches on my face continue to squirt blood, they won't stop, leaukemia means they will never stop bleeding.
Maybe if I bleed more, the Cancer will flow out of me.
"DARCY!" I hear ben and my mum rushing up the stairs.
Without a second thought, I tip all the pills into my mouth as fast as I can, whilst using the other hand to continue squirting the blood from my arms and face.

Ben's POV:

"DARCY WHERE ARE YOU? DARCY PLEASE STOP THIS."
I hear screaming and tears coming from her room, I stop at her doorway and freeze in terror, but then her mum comes rushing from behind me and grabs the pills from out of her hands.
"NO DARCY, NO DONT DO THIS TO YOURSELF!"
"NO MUM! NO, GIVE THEM BACK, I WANT TO DIE MUM, I WANT TO DIE!"
Her mum tightly squeezes her then they both collapse onto the floor in their own tears. I rush over to the innocent girl I no longer can see. I stare at the blood streaming from her face and arms, and then glare at her blood filled nails. She did this to herself.
"Mummy I want to die, mummy please let me die.WHY DID YOU DO THIS BEN I TOLD YOU NOT TO STOP ME!" I launch towards both of the sobbing women and wrap my arms around both of them. Then I suddenly feel Darcy slowly slip down from us both.
"SARAH SHES UNCONSCIOUS. YOU NEED TO CALL AN AMBULANCE."
"NO, IM NOT LEAVING HER" she rocks a broken, half dead girl in her arms whilst screaming for her to wake up.
"Darcy it's alright, please Darcy, wake up, it's alright, your going to be fine."

--

(Still Ben's POV)

The ambulance finally arrives and even they are stunned at the sight of this suicidal scene.
" let's get her on the stretcher."
"Wait now?" Her mum shrieks.
"Yes, we have no Time to loose."
"But shouldn't you check her over first."
"Not when she's just attempted suicide, we don't know what she has done to herself. She needs to go NOW!"
Her mum continues to rock her from side to side, me and the paramedics have to force her off her daughter.
"We'll take good care of her, she's going to be alright. You can come in the ambulance with us."
She physically shakes as she follows Darcy on the stretcher.

I decide to drive behind her in the ambulance, I can't stand to look at her whilst she's like that.
She physically tore herself apart, so desperate to escape from her own terminally diseased body.
My emotions take over, my driving isn't safe. The one who i care about the most could be a flicker away from the end...