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20: What Kind Of Forest Is This?

20: What Kind of Forest is This?

We reached the start of a forest and Kili's hands gripped my waist. I looked down at his hands.

"Are you afraid?" I asked him and turned.

He slightly nodded and I smiled reassuringly at him.

Gandalf instructed, "Send the ponies back to their owner!"

We all got off and started unpacking everything. Gandalf had ventured into the start of the forest, and I went to Dwalin.

"What do you think is gonna happen?" I asked him worriedly.

"Nothing good. Here," he handed me one of his swords, "I won't let you go in there unarmed, lass. Since I won't give you my axes, I'll give you this."

I did a few tricks with the sword and slid it into my belt (courtesy of one of the towns we visited a while back). He knew I wasn't unarmed: I had Galmdring, and about three daggers.

"Thank you, Dwalin," I said.

"What's this business with turning into animals?" He finally undid everything from the horse.

I told him, "Beorn told me I was a Gricogon, or whatever. And now I can turn into a bear or wolf whenever I want to. I don't understand it fully, and there's a prophecy to go with it too."

"Aye," he said, nodded, and turned away.

I walked back over to Kili and ran my hands through my hair.

"Who lives here again?" I asked.

Kili replied, "Thranduil."

My eyes widened. "Isn't he-"

"LEAVE MY HORSE! I need it."

Gandalf emerged from the woods and I stopped petting a horse. All of us looked at him.

"You're not leaving us," Bilbo said in a squeaky voice.

Gandalf looked down at him, "I would not do this unless I had to."

"Wait what?" I looked up at him, "We need you."

"I am sorry," he looked at me, "This is necessary."

I sighed and it started to rain. I loved rain, but this was no time to stay and jump in it. We were a few short days before Durin's Day, and we couldn't miss our only chance.

"Wait for me by the overlook on the slopes on Erebor. Keep that map and key safe," he looked at Thorin, "Do not enter that mountain without me."

Thorin nodded, then looked at Balin.

"This is not the Greenwood of Old. There is a stream in the woods that carries a dark enchantment, do not touch the water. Cross only by the stone bridge. The very air of the forest is heavy with illusion; it will seek to enter your mind and lead you astray,"

What the fuck? You've got damn trolls, rude elves, a damn dragon, Orgs and Wargs, and now a fucking forest that plays mind games. Can I take a damn day off? My bisexual self can't take this.

"You must stay on the path. Do not leave it," Gandalf mounted his horse and yelled, "Stay on the path!"

He rode away and Thorin led us into the forest. I instantly felt claustrophobic and wanted to get out. I trudged forward as the dwarves started talking. The trees and air felt sick, and soon so did I. For what seemed like hours we walked on through the red and green forest. I almost broke my ankle, split my head open, and ran into a spiderweb. Spiderwebs. They always turned up the path we were going, but I didn't think anything of it. I sniffed and smelt my favorite food ever: pizza.

"OhMyGod, guys guys guys," I whined, "There's fuckin' pizza. I'm gonna go look for it."

Thorin held my arm, "Andiel, we have to stay on the path."

Everything felt spaced out and my head started to swim.

"But pizza!"

We were all breathing heavily and our feet sounded loud against the leaves and branches.

A few minutes later I said, "Shhh. We have to be quiet, and careful. We're stepping on the ants."

My speech sounded muddled and I kept hearing faint whistling. I plopped down on the ground.

"Yes little ants. Speak to your queen. You know what guys? I think I'm gonna stay here and govern my colony. OhMyGod, what if they think I'm a dictator?" I covered my mouth with my hand.

"Andiel this is no time for jokes," Thorin said gruffly.

"But I'm not! This is a real life situation!"

Dwalin rolled his eyes at my comment and we trudged forward.

"I need air," Bofur said.

Oin commented, "My head...its swimming."

Was this what it was like to be drunk? Everything was in like three colors moving back and forth and I could barely keep my legs from crumbling.

"How bout iii sing a songg? Ready? One two three.. I forgot it. Kili, I forgot the lines I'm dying. Its my favorite songgg," I squinted, "Hey where did everyone go?"

I was alone. I felt someone grab me and suddenly everything was upside down.

"oH Nuh. Nuh uh suger huney I won't let you take my flailing bones."

"She's completely lost it," I heard two voices on either side of me.

Were my eyes broken or what? I couldn't see anyone. All I saw were trees.

"Andiel. ANDIEL!"

"WHAT?!" I snapped.

I blinked and I was at the edge of a bridge. I jumped up and stumbled back. I turned around and Thorin was next to me.

I asked, "What just happened?"

"You passed out and were mumbling something."

My head was burning and I clutched it.

"Is that the water Gandalf told us not to touch?" I asked.

Thorin said, "Yes."

"We should definitely touch it," Bofur said.

"I second that," I put up my hand.

"Look, here are some vines," Kili pulled.

"Lele Pons is here?!" I looked around and fell down again. Thorin put his hand on my back.

"We're all affected by this. Come on Andiel," Thorin said.

His speech started to muddle and I heard him say something to Kili. Next thing I knew Bilbo was balancing on the ropes.

"Ugh, Thorin, why are you yelling?" I creased my eyebrows.

"Andiel, I didn't say anything."

"Yeah. Yeah, you did. You said I'm going to eat all of them."

"What?"

"STAY WHERE YOU ARE!" Bilbo yelled.

"Too late for that buddy bud bud." Thorin and I landed next to him and we all looked at each other.

I heard something and failed at pulling out Dwalin's sword. It slipped into the water and we all looked up. A beautiful white stag appeared and I gasped.

Oh my fucking god this is some Harry potter shit. I HEAR YOU JAMES!

"What are you doing?" Bilbo asked Thorin who shot at the stag.

"Awe now it's gone," I whined.

"You shouldn't have done that," Bilbo said and I looked at Thorin, "It'll bring you bad luck."

Thorin replied gruffly, "I don't believe in luck. We make our own luck."

I dived into the water to retrieve the sword and instantly knew something was wrong.