Hazed | 5SOS

22.

After a long, boring class I rubbed my temples before getting up to leave. Everyone filed out and I wanted to avoid the rush.

"Everything alright, Autumn?" My professor looked at me, gathering his own stuff.

"Oh." I looked up and saw everyone was really gone, "Yes, yes, everything's just fine. Sorry, I just wanted to skip the after classroom rush."

"Are you sure?" He asked, my Criminology Professor's name was Dr. Broneds. He was a much older gentleman with long gray hair, and spectacles that resembled Harry Potters. He looks much older than he really is, he looks like he could be 80 when you can tell he's probably only 50. He was one of those really fun professors you wished you could get cause he makes the class so much more interesting, "You looked distracted today."

"Just been a long day, I think." I made the weak excuse, beginning to put away my notebook which had little doodles all over the page.

"Mhm." Dr. Broneds nodded, "You know, Autumn, I make my living off of profiling people. I understand if you don't want to tell me, I can tell you don't like burdening people with your issues. But I urge you from time to time to be vulnerable, if not to me to someone close to you. It makes all the difference in our lives as human beings to be vulnerable. Could you imagine? A whole world where no one is afraid of being inferior because it's being vulnerable is not a sign of weakness. That, that is the world we should be living in."

I nodded as I stood by the door now. He was that kind of professor. He was staring off at the top of the class and pointed his fingers to make points. I know I should've felt uncomfortable by this obvious over stepping of boundaries, but it was comforting somehow to know that someone noticed me and urges me to be better.

"Thank you, Dr. Broneds. I think it's more another person who I'd like to be vulnerable with me." I sigh, scratching the back of my neck.

"We demand the respect and affection we give to others, but people are people and don't have to give you the same in return. I've had many students whom I know have many issues and they scurry off before I'm allowed to even say a word. Always reciprocation is demanded but it doesn't need to be given. Give it time, Autumn." He put a hand on my shoulder, "Soon enough you'll find that things aren't always as bad as you think they are."

He opened the door for me and I thanked him. He really did help, I appreciated that he saw me today.

Thinking about Luke was never my #1 thought. Instead it lingered in the back of my mind like someone whispering so silently down my back so quietly that you couldn't hear what they were saying, just feeling the breath tickle the hairs of your neck.

It was just my luck that I saw Nick leave a classroom down the hall. I stopped dead in my tracks and turned 180 degrees to go the opposite direction. I couldn't bear for any more love interests or heartbreak today. When I got a tap on the shoulder then I was ready to turn around and break his wrist, but to my delight it wasn't Nick who I was met with.

"Hey, Autumn." Ashton smiled.

"Hey!" I let go a sigh of relief, "I thought you were- never mind."

"That kid, Nick?" Ashton rolled his eyes, "He's been in my class for a while now and is such a fucking prick. Don't worry, Luke, Cal, Mike, and I gave him an ear full for hurting you. He's not coming near you again."

"You did?" I said, surprised, "You guys never told me you did that?"

"Luke told us not to tell you. It was his idea." Ashton said. Just his name made my spine shiver, "But I figure what's the harm now, it's been a few months."

"Yeah.. I guess it has been." I said, "Well, thanks for that. That's a nice lift from my shoulders."

"Of course, you should've seen his face. He was so scared, blubbering about how sorry he was." Ashton laughed, "We were never going to do anything serious. It was just to scare him."

"You guys are dicks." I laughed, pushing him with my shoulder as we walked out.

"He's the dick." Ashton defended himself, "That's what he'll probably be for Halloween tomorrow."

"Oh yeah, Halloween is tomorrow." I remembered.

"Yeah, are you dressing up?" Ashton asked,

"Do people normally dress up?" I asked.

"For the party we're going to they do." He nodded.

"Like sexy bunny dress up or giant banana?" I asked.

"Is there a difference?" Ashton asked.

"Huge." I clarified.

"Just ask what Jenna is wearing and wear something similar to that." Ashton advised, "I only pray that it's nothing too showy, for other guys' sake."

"I'll try to put in a good word for you." I nodded.

"Thank you." He said, "So, Michael told me you stayed over at our place last night.. With someone special..?" Ashton rose an eyebrow expecting a fun answer but I only groaned and held my face in one hand.

"What'd he do?" Ashton asked right away, going big brother mode.

"Nothing.. Everything? I don't know." I sighed, "Everything was fine this morning, we were going great. We were happy for a hot minute, then he got the waitress' phone number at breakfast."

"He.. What?" Ashton was astonished, "No way?"

"I mean, he didn't actively try to get it? She gave it to him but it upset me because he could've said no! And he hid it from me." I said, "I don't know, maybe I'm overreacting."

"What do you mean he hid it from you?" Ashton asked.

"Like he didn't tell me, but it was in his jacket pocket and when I moved his jacket it fell out and it was there. He claimed she just gave it to him and that it wasn't a big deal." Actually saying it out loud, it sounds really stupid. "It's stupid, isn't it?"

"Little bit." Ashton admitted, "Listen, the part where he hid it from you, that's dumb. But Luke's never cared about someone like this before. You think you're scared, Luke is 20x more terrified. He just shows it in a different way. You both don't want to get hurt, so don't hurt each other. So if y'all like each other, stop making it difficult on yourselves. Coming from someone who played these same kind of games as you two are it's so much easier to just give into it."

That made me feel a lot easier. My stomach felt less queazy. I felt steady.

"Thanks, Ash." I smiled. Luke has spent so much time chasing me, but now I think it's time I chase him, "And as much as I'm loving this chat. I think I need to go make up with someone quickly."