Mr. Misty-Eyed | Josh Dun

reality | three

"Why wont you speak, where I happen to be,
Silent in the trees, standing cowardly."

. . . . .

I shifted in bed as I pulled the multiple blankets piled on top of me up over my head. The air in my room was cold, but it couldn't reach me from my position hidden away. I didn't move from my spot as I curled into myself and let out a long sigh. Yet another night spent unable to escape the cruelty of my mind. Would it ever end?

After a long moment I finally emerged from underneath my blankets, my heart racing as the light streaming in through the window blinded me. The covers were back over my head, my mind telling me I was still dreaming and if I looked around I'd see nothing but ice. But I knew, I told myself I wasn't and that I was safe in the light of day.

I peered out, expecting the worst, but was relieved when my eyes came in contact with my bedside table and the stack of tapes Tyler had left behind for me. It was then that I finally sat up and stood from my bed.

Day two without Tyler. I made it. I smiled to myself at my tiny victory, hoping that today would be the slightest bit easier. I made my way downstairs and over to the thermostat in the hallway by the front door. I scratched lazily at my bare chest with my free hand as the other turned the heat up a few degrees. I honestly hated winter. It was just dull, grey and gloomy.

My feet padded against the tiled floor as I moved around the kitchen. I pulled a box of waffles from the freezer and popped two into the toaster. Be normal. I told myself. Eat breakfast. Make coffee. I had to push myself or I'd just end up lying on the couch with an empty stomach.

I took a cautionary sip of my coffee as I carried my plate of food across the hall and into the living room. I set everything down onto the coffee table before taking a seat on the couch. Even doing a morning routine I still ended up there, but at least I wouldn't be hungry. That was how life seemed to be nowadays. Even though it had been a couple off weeks since I got laid off from my job, I still hadn't found the energy or brainpower to search for a new one.

I scoffed at the thought before taking a bite of food. My old boss had always been a dick, but I had put up with it because I needed the money. But there had been budget cuts at the company, which meant the lonesome mail boy was the first to go. My boss had been all too happy to fire me. Now Tyler was left to pay rent and utilities until I found a new place to work. He has told me not to worry about it countless times, but of course I did.

My eyes wandered around the room absentmindedly. It was cluttered and messy, but what could you expect from two guys in their late 20's. There's that saying about how a clean room means a clean mind and for a second the idea seemed good, but then I realized that if I did clean I'd probably throw away something Tyler wanted to keep. I didn't need Tyler mad at me the second he got back from his trip. With just that thought, the whole idea went out the window.

As my eyes trailed back toward the tv still playing cartoons, the DVD box resting on top of it caught my attention. Maybe all I needed to keep my mind occupied were a couple of new movies to watch.

I smiled at the brilliant idea and headed back up to my room to put on some street clothes. I was back in the living room no more than ten minutes later. I grabbed the DVD and then went into the kitchen in search of my keys. Once they were safely in my hand, I headed out the front door, securely locking it behind me.

"Come on!" I slammed my hands against the steering wheel as the car ahead of me turned right at an almost glacial pace.

"Stupid," I mumbled to myself as I drove down another block before putting my turn signal on and sliding into a parking space right in front of the no name video store.