Red Vs Blue Book of One-Shots

If the gym had a face, I'd punch it.

"Just 50 more reps, guys!"

"Thats easy for you to say you buff- OW! What the hell?!"

"Tucker?"

"What?!"

"Finish your reps."

If murder was an emotion, Tucker was feeling it. Ever since Church told him to lose weight ("Give the guy a break! He just had a kid!"), Tucker was forced to go to this gym-but-not-a-gym-place called 'Freelance theory'.

You go for an hour twice a week, and you don't know shit about the work out.

So much for skipping on endurance day.

The workout is set up by a personal trainer, which is assigned a whole day of classes, and usually sticks to the schedule.

Tucker has Thursdays and Saturdays.

Wanna know you else has those days?

David motherfucking Washington.

The middle name is a nickname of sorts.

Wash hates Tucker. Tucker hates Wash. Tucker literally cannot go any other day of the week so he's forced to be trained by an ex-special ops guy with no comprehension of the word
'Break'.

"Tucker, you did forty push-ups."

"... Ugh... And...?" Tucker replied sassily, out of breath.

"Ten more."

"But why?!"

"Because you're paying for a private trainer."

"Bow Chicka- OKAY OKAY DON'T STEP ON ME!"

Of course, Tucker only went because of basic training in the military school. The school required intensive workouts twice a week, which were supervised by the top students at the school.

Those students being Carolina, York, North Dakota, South Dakota and Wash.

You would get York if you're lucky, and get Carolina if you have a death wish.

A big one, at that.

But no one went to Wash. Tucker was on the blue team rotation, meaning he always worked out with Caboose, a guy with freakishly strong arms, and Church, and annoying asshole.

So they made Tucker look good.

But- not good enough.

Tucker nearly died on endurance days, and power days were his worst enemy. Tucker looked good, but he wasn't exactly the body builder that could literally pick up chicks.

It's just a metaphor, dude!

"Tucker, raise your incline. You can do better than that."

"I'm at a 12 incline with 5 speed!"

"And?"

"... Fuck me."

"Later." Wash winked at Tucker after his sly joke.

"Oh my god. Guys. Wash made a joke. About sex. Quick, get the ladies, cause it'll be like a karaoke party in here. Wash made a joke."

"Just raise your incline to 13. I won't ask again." Wash said seriously.

After Wash walked off to help another peep , Tucker repeated Wash's last words in a babyish voice to mock him.

Today was gonna be a long workout.

~~~~~

"And that's sixty minutes. You're done, good job guys!" Wash said as he clapped his hands together.

Finally, this weird version of torture has ended.

And not the fun kind of weird.

"Good job buddy, you survived another day of the state terror." Church sarcastically cheered as he clapped Tucker on the back.

"Ow! Don't do that, I'm sore!" Tucker whined.

"Tucker! I made it with fifty pound weights!" Caboose yelled happily, and crushed Tucker in a hug."

A broken "ow" was faintly heard under the giant's grip.

"Tucker, my office, now." Wash grumbled as he walked by the three.

"Oooooo-"

"Shut up, Church. Caboose, get off. I'll met you in the car."

~~(take me to church started playing while I was writing RIP)~~

Tucker stomped into Wash's office.

"What do you want, asshole?"

"To tell you that you've been falling behind on your exercise routines. They won't accept this at training-"

"I know, but I just had a kid, can a get a damn break around here?!"

"Very funny, Tucker."

"I'm serious."

"... What the fuck?"

"The alien guy?"

"... Holy shit that's you?!"

"Hi."

"Well... Uh... I guess... I should apologize?"

"Nah, just don't tell anyone and I'll spare you." Tucker said sassily as he began to walk out the door.

"Ah... Right. So uh... About that apology... Lunch?" Wash said quickly.

Tucker turned around, and hesitated. But hey, free food!

"If you choose a restaurant that only serves salads I'm good."

"I promise it'll have a dessert bar." Wash joked.

"See you at 12, captain." Tucker called as he ran to the car which was honking loudly from outside.

(Part 2 or ¯\_(ツ)_/¯

Also sorry that it has been a literally month since I did anything bUT school ends early for us so

Yey)