Figments || FIN

0.23: Sucka

At the time, I didn't realize how much of a fool I was.

I'd made mistakes, like everyone else but my mistakes could be weighed if need be. A foreign objective but it could be done.

I let my soul intertwine with others. Let them dance and mingle freely; however they pleased. Just to experience some form of bliss. Although, I rather not word it like that, it is what it is.

Every ounce of who I thought I was slipped from me. Circled around me and said no goodbye. Being the victim I failed to realize what was going on in any given situation. I made decisions based on temporary emotions and backed it up with knowledge. At the end of the day, I claimed everything to be normal and I promised I wouldn't do it again if it brought tears to my eyes after dawn.

So delusional, prancing around in my own world and joining the real world every so often.
Love sucks. We hate it in its rawest form but we crave it. The desire to be entangled forever more in someone's embrace and taken care of is beyond natural. Some allow it while others may run from it, knowing possible outcomes. I on the other hand, knew the outcomes, erased them, ran and let it catch up to me. The stupidity that consumed me was bliss. I let it consume me and sometimes I wish I didn't. However, the past is my past and I can't touch it. It's actually unfair like everything in life. I can't touch it but it has the ability to touch me freely, however it pleases.
Now I realize how much a fool I truly was. How much of a fool I truly am. Knowing things and pushing them away although everything in me is telling me I know right from wrong, I ignore it. I simply ignore anything that screams at me and makes me feel worse than I could possibly feel. I've be some accustomed to it and it's sad. The way love has tripped me up and drained me of my sanity, I'm truly a sucker for love.