COME WHAT MAY

CHAPTER TWENTY-TWO

By the time Lolita got back inside the church, Christine had left and her father had narrated the events of the past three years to him. She looked at the shocked expression on the Pastor's face and tried to stifle a laugh. But her father's pretense for three years was pretty serious. He still attended church and prayed; read his bible, evangelize and do other religious activities but he had ceased to be a Christian because Christ's love was no longer in him and he had turned a deaf ear to God's caution about the path he took. The Pastor was shocked but slowly began to recover. He had experienced something similar with other members of the church, some even worse but his shock came from the fact that a dear brother and friend in Christ could fall victim of such tragic temptation. His dear friend did not give himself away these past three years as he maintained his usual demeanor towards others and particularly towards his beloved daughter.

"I cannot believe a love as great as yours towards this precious young woman could change let alone turn into hatred. You literally detested her and treated her like a powerless enemy because you surely had the upper hand. For these three years she was in the dark about what went wrong and you knew but did not say anything. My God! We are back to the same circle brethren. Cycle of lies, secrets, mistrust, anger, hate and pride!" He got up from his recliner and paced around his office slowly. 

"This is absolutely unbelievable. The Lord repeatedly made me pray for your family these past months and I kept wondering why until recently when I was told Lolita got hospitalized and nearly lost her life." He turned directly to Prof. Badmus. "She tried to kill herself because of you...this is truly disappointing...unbelievable." Prof. Badmus hung his head in remorse and shame.

Lolita scratched her scalp through the wig. It was really irritating putting a wig on a nearly bald head. The constant itch alone was unbearable even though the wig cap was on. 

"Pastor if you don't mind, could I be excused? I have a headache coming...I can feel it already. This past two days have been ground shaking for me and I must go and rest and prepare for the Sunday school children." The Pastor went back to his seat and stared at her. She felt uncomfortable as his eyes seem to be searching her very soul. She moved her eyes from his gaze and began fiddling with the hem of her dress top.

"Lolita...my dear child..." The Pastor's voice seem to trail off forever then Grace said "Pastor please help me ask for forgiveness from my husband. I should have told him twenty six years ago. All the pain my daughter suffered was my fault. I should have trusted him with whatever happened that night instead of carrying the burden alone."

She sat next to Lolita on the sofa and said, "please forgive me my daughter. I caused this pain you suffered. It is I alone you should blame." Lolita wanted to roll her eyes and said "are you just realizing it?" But she kept her mouth shut. She knew her mother was the root cause...if she had told her husband then he might have done a DNA test earlier and his mother's "dying declaration" would have had less effect as Grace did not know who raped her. Lolita rubbed her temples...

"Mum all the new and crazy information my mind has been absorbing plus the thinking my mind has been doing will certainly kill off my brain cells. Please let me go and rest."

"Am I forgiven?" Lolita hugged her mother and replied,

"You were scared mum. You felt trapped and alone. I am sorry that you had to keep this to yourself for so long. I love you." Just then Prof. Badmus stood before them. The two women separated and slowly stood up.

"Dayo I am sincerely sorry. I really am." Grace said with tears streaming down her face. Lolita stepped away from them and stood by the Pastor's table.