Secrets

Chapter 6

Wow guys 50 reads?! I'm really happy and grateful and I'm sorry I haven't updated in like what a week? Idk well here's the update for y'all! -Sarina❤

----

In just two days I would be going back to Ohio with Niall, I would be lying if I said I wasn't nervous. There are so many things I have kept hidden, so many things happened in Ohio, I just felt like I needed an escape. I was so thankful when Louis offered to move to New York with me three years ago, he had his own reasons but one of them was so that I wouldn't be alone.

I felt my phone vibrate a few times before I finally picked it up, it was Julie. "I heard you're going on another vacation, what's up with that?" Julie joked, I wasn't the one to take many trips, so it was quite unusual for me to take two in a row. "I dunno, I felt like I needed a break from work." The lie slipped out of my mouth, but I was used to it, there's no way I'm telling Julie I'm going to Ohio. That would just lead to other questions she will have about my past. "Lucky you, well Harry is throwing a pool party at his house, wanna come?" She offered, Harry was one of the small group of people in New York who actually owned a house and not an apartment, he lived on the far side of New York City, where there weren't as much buildings. Harry has rich parents so I guess it made sense. "I guess a little swimming wouldn't hurt." I said, after chatting for a little more Julie hung up, leaving me to decide what to wear. I wore my two piece, neon green bikini under my red tank top, and my blue jean shorts. I put my hair in messy bun and grabbed my keys. I would need a taxi, since it would take me at least an hour to get there if I walked. I got into the taxi that had stopped for me and politely instructed the driver where to go.

I got out of the taxi and gave him the money, watching him drive off. I take in a deep breath and walk over to the door before knocking a few times. Harry opens the door with a huge smile, showing his dimples. "Hi Haz!" I smiled, giving him a hug. "Hey Mar!" He replied, we all had our own nicknames. Harry lead me into his huge backyard, where everyone was sitting. Sasha and Zayn were swimming in the pool, Julie was tanning, and Niall and Louis were near the pool talking when Harry walked up to them. I hesitated before slowly taking off my tank top and shorts, Louis whistled just to embarrass me even further. "Shut up Louis!" I yelled, when suddenly Zayn pulled me into the water with him, the cold water sending chills down my body. "Zayn!" I whined, as he laughed in reply. I splashed some water on him, before Louis suggested we play Chicken fight. I hopped into Niall's back, holding on to his neck as he held my thighs. Julie got on top of Harry and Sasha got on top of Louis, leaving Zayn to be the ref. "Ready, set, GO!" He yelled as I quickly pushed Sasha into the water, making everyone laugh. "No fair! I wasn't ready yet!" Sasha pouted, but I was too concentrated on dunking everyone else to care. Soon everyone fell off their partners, thanks to Niall and I, and we had won the game. "Losers! L-O-S-E-R-S! What does that spell?! LOSERS!!!" I chanted, Niall laughing as he watched me. "You nearly made me drown!" Harry complained, as I waved the finger in the air. "Real lady-like..." Harry said, laughing at my actions. "I'm not here to be lady like, I'm here to kick ass!" I said as I did a few karate moves, everyone laughing at my actions, let's just say I get a bit carried away sometimes...

"OKAY EVERYONE HARRY AND I ARE HEADING OUT TO BRING Y'ALL SOME PIZZA AND LIAM SHOULD BE HERE SOON!" Louis yelled, making Zayn cover his ears. "Louis you are literally right next to me I don't think you need to shout." Zayn quietly said. "I LIKE TO SHOUT, DEAL WITH PRETTY BOY!" Louis shouted once again, making me giggle. I loved how childish he was. After Louis and Harry left Niall, Julie and I started chatting for a bit until Liam finally arrived. Zayn and Liam arm wrestled, and Liam won, of course. Everyone was talking when the pizza finally arrived, everyone running to it in hunger. "I'll have the pepperoni!!" I yelled, pushing through Liam and Sasha. "Not until I get my Veggie!" Julie yelled, yanking me back. "EVERYONE SHUT UP AND GET IN A GOD DAMN LINE! GEEZ LAUEZ CAN'T WE GET SOME DECENCY?!"
Louis yelled. We all groaned in complaint and got in a line, as Louis instructed. Once everyone grabbed their pizza I took a seat next to Niall. We haven't mentioned the kiss to each other yet, and I'm not planning on doing so anytime soon. I would just have to wait until our date tomorrow night to see how he really feels about me.

After we finished eating it was time to leave, and Niall offered to drive me home; once again. "Thank you for the ride home, ill see you tomorrow night?" I said, getting out of the car. "Yeah, of course. Bye." He said, as I watched him drive off, I'm just glad it's not awkward between us because of the kiss. I walked into the lobby, waving at the man at the front desk and taking the stairs this time. I unlocked my front door and walked inside my apartment. I changed into my pajamas and grabbed a tub of ice cream out of the fridge. I got my spoon and took a seat on the couch, watching TV and eating mint-chocolate ice cream. I turned off the TV when I realized it was eleven pm and put the the ice cream away, hopping under the covers and falling asleep thinking about Niall.

I was walking home after work, excited for my date. Then again, what if he only set up this date because he felt bad for me? Or he just wanted to use me for something. I tried getting the bad thoughts out of my head as I opened the door to my apartment. I had an hour to get ready before Niall came to pick me up. The more I thought about it the more I felt bad, I don't want him to pay for our food and I hope he doesn't take me somewhere expensive. I wouldn't want him to think I want him just for his money, considering the fact he works in one of the biggest video game companies in New York. I let out a deep breath and walked into my closet. I stripped off my old clothing and wore my ruby red, sparkly, one-strap dress that reached my mid thighs. It would get cold at night so I brought my black cardigan with me just in case. I put my hair in a high pony tail and applied eyeliner, mascara, and red lipstick. Before I knew it I heard a knock on the door. I opened to find Niall wearing a fancy tux. "You look beautiful." He whispered, looking up and down, his eyes finally meeting mine. I blushed at his words. "Thanks, you look handsome" I said with a wink. He grabbed my hands and lead me out of my apartment and into a limo, oh god, he didn't have to do this. "You really didn't have to do this Niall." I said, as Niall helped me into the limo. Once the driver started driving Niall poured some red wine in a wine glass for the both of us, handing me one. "Don't mention it, you deserve the best." He said, as we both took a sip of the red wine.

The limo dropped us off at a fancy restaurant near Manhattan. We walked over to the front desk. "Horan." Was all he had to say to get us inside. They showed us our seats, the view by the window showed the city perfectly, and our seats were away from other people. Niall pulled my chair for me and I thanked him as he took a seat too. "This is all too wonderful, I can't thank you enough." I said, still amazed by how far Niall would go to make me happy. Our food arrived and we started eating. Suddenly Niall stopped and grabbed both of my hands. "Enough of all this cheesiness, I want to get to the point. Maria... Will you be my girlfriend." Niall said, as I started to blush. Suddenly something came over me, I felt like someone was stabbing my heart over and over again. I felt tears flowing down my cheeks, I could barely speak right. "Maria? Are you okay?" Niall started to panic, getting out of his seat and coming to mine with a concerned look. I couldn't do this, what if fell in love with him, and he left me. I can't bare another heartbreak, I can't handle the pain anymore. "Niall- I- I really like you... It's just that..." I stopped, taking in a deep breath. "I can't, I can't go through all of the pain again, I can't!" I let it out, starting to sob as Niall held on to me, embracing me. I cried on to his shirt for a while, then I finally stopped and looked into his eyes that I seemed to get lost to every time. "I-I'm just too afraid to love again..." I whispered, wiping away a tear. "It's okay. I'm sorry, I should've known it was too soon, I should've known you're not ready." Niall said, blaming himself for all of this, I just wish I could tell him, let go of it all. A heart is a heavy burden...

Niall dropped me home, giving me a kiss on the forehead as I got out of the car. "Goodbye Niall, and thank you. Tonight was amazing." I said, walking away as he waved goodbye. I watched him drive off, then walked back inside. I changed into my pajamas and laid in bed, thinking. How stupid could I be? I just rejected the best thing that has happened to me in the past three years, or ever since Josh... I fell asleep, lost in my own thoughts.

Niall's P.O.V*

After dropping Maria off I decided that I had to go see Louis, maybe he could tell me what caused Maria to be so afraid, so heart broken. I parked my car on the side of the street, making sure to lock it. It was midnight but I was sure Louis would answer. I knocked on the door a few times before he finally opened up, scratching his eyes. "What the hell are you doing here at twelve in the morning?" Louis mumbled, gesturing me to come in. "I want to talk to you about Maria. I want to know what happened to her." I said, taking a seat on the couch as Louis did the same. I cared too much about Maria to leave her like this, I felt like it was my job to make her happy again. I would do anything to see her smile. Louis looked at me for a moment, like he was thinking weather I'm trustworthy or not. "How far are you willing to go for her?" Louis finally asked. "I would do anything to see her happy." I truthfully said. "Okay, well you can't tell Maria about anything I tell you tonight. Do not mention it to her until she trusts you enough with the information. Clear?" Louis asked firmly, as I nodded in reply. "Clear." I said. "Three summers ago, in Ohio, Maria fell in love for the first time..." Louis said, looking down at his fingertips. I nodded to show him I was listening. "His name was Josh, and those two were inseparable. They were together every moment of every day, they fought, but they always made up. Josh made her forget about her mother, forget about whatever was going on with the world. Josh protected her, and took care of her, he made sure she was happy." Louis explained. "Then?" I asked, waiting for Louis to continue. Louis let out a deep breath, then continued. "On Maria's birthday, they were driving to a romantic picnic together... When a car crashed into them. Maria was badly injured, but Josh... He-the doctors said he wouldn't make it, after two months in a coma." Louis said, as his voice cracked a bit. "Maria changed for a while, she didn't cry, she just suffered. She stopped talking for a while, stopped caring, stopped eating. She tried so hard to move on, but the truth is I don't think she can. She was a complete different person. Now she's a bit better, she used to take counseling twice a week, and that helped her a little. But her fear of driving never really stopped, it's all because of the accident. I think she blames herself." Louis explained. This was all too tragic, I don't know what I would do if something like this ever happened to me. Now I understand Maria, Why she acted so strange on the car ride home from Miami. "That's terrible." I finally said. "It is, and that's why Maria is afraid, she's afraid to love again, because she's afraid she will be left alone and heat broken again." Louis explained. "I would never hurt her." I whispered. "Well now you know the truth, tonight never happened, understand?" Louis asked. "Understand." I said. After saying our goodbyes I drove home, thinking about Maria the entire time. I cared too much to just leave her like this, broken.

I changed into my shorts and t-shirt, and laid in bed, thinking this through. I had to take things slow with Maria, and I had to be gentle with her. I want to help her, I don't want to see her broken like this. I almost feel like...like I love Maria. I can't tell her now, she needs time, she needs to trust me.