Secrets

Chapter 25

HEYYYY YA'LL :) this chapter is dedicated to lorde264 because she's freaking amazing and btw I love LORDE too ;) I love her songs "The Love Club" and "Bravado". Okay well I hope you guys enjoy this chapter and in case you haven't heard yet I'm going to be writing a new fan fic soon, I already have the title, cover, and the story line and I'm not going to be writing the first chapter till sometime by the end of November or something. Don't forget to follow my Instagram- sarina_pink -Sarina

--------

I woke up with the bright sunshine coming from the window as it hit my eyes. I slowly got up and yawned, stretching my arms in the process. The view from outside was amazing and I can't believe my dad lives here. It's so different from New York, I can't hear any honking sounds from cars, which is something I've gotten used to. I walked over to my luggage and grabbed some sweatpants and a simple white v-neck. I headed into the bathroom and quickly brushed my teeth and hair.

When I walked down stairs I smelt waffles and pancakes. There were different types of fruits laid out across the dining table, each plate set with pork chops, pancakes and whipped cream, and blueberry waffles. I was quite amazed. "This looks really good." I said, taking a seat next to Catharine. "I know, my mom is like the best cook." She said, digging into her food. "Oh good morning Maria!" Elizabeth said, turning around as she had just noticed me. "Morning." I replied back. "Where's my dad?" I asked, looking around the room as I noticed he was not present at the moment. "Oh honey he's at work, he usually comes back around three. It'll give us plenty of time to look around Los Angeles and have some girl bonding time!" Elizabeth said with excitement clear in her face, making Catharine roll her eyes at her.

I wish my life was like that, I wish I still had a mom. I wish I had someone to cook me breakfast and encourage me to do better on my school work, to yell at me for not doing my chores, to hug me and kiss me on the forehead when I cry. I wish my mom was here, I miss her so fucking much. "So what are we doing today?" I asked as I took a bite out of my delicious pancake. "My mom said we can go watch a movie or go to the mall or something." Catharine answered back. I felt so comfortable with the two of them, more comfortable than how I feel near my dad; and these two people aren't even sharing the same blood as me. It's funny to me, how my dad thought everything would go back to normal just by paying me a visit, how all those times I cried in my room; wondering what was wrong with me that caused my dad to leave, would be fixed just by one simple visit to come see me, after nine years of abandoning me.

"We should just go to the mall or something." I suggested as Catharine nodded. "I need some new jeans anyways." She said, wiping her lips with a napkin. "Well I gotta go get ready." I said, excusing my self from the table. I just really wanted to talk to Niall, and I probably sound like an obsessive bitch. I really don't care, I have so much to tell him, and later on I want to call Louis. I walked upstairs and took out my laptop. I went on Skype and he was online. "Hey Princess." He said, he seemed to be at some kind of a fast food place, with a burger in his hand. "Hey, if you're busy I can talk some other time.." I said, noticing he was with Harry. "Hi Harry." I said, waving at the camera. "Hi Maria!" He replied, flashing me a wink as he went back to eating. "No it's cool, we're just grabbing a bite before going back to my house, that's all." He said, grabbing a bite out of his food. "So how's Los Angeles." He finally said. "Good, I took your advice and you're right, Catharine and Elizabeth aren't that bad, I'm going shopping with them later." I said, hugging the pillow near me. "That's good to hear, I'm just going to Sasha's birthday party tonight." He said, making me freeze in place. I totally forgot it was today and why would he go without me, he knows I wouldn't approve of this. He noticed my sudden change in mood. "Maria it's alright, I'm going with Louis and Harry." He said, reassuring me a little. At least with Louis there I know everything will be okay.

We said our goodbyes and I closed my laptop and put it away. I decided on wearing something casual to the mall, and straightened my hair. It's been a long time since I've actually spent time on my hair anyway. I applied eyeliner and lipgloss and I was ready to go. I walked into Catharines room, but made sure to knock before I entered. "Can you help me zip this up?" She asked. She was wearing a nice floral dress that didn't look too casual yet too fancy. I helped her zip up her dress and we talked the entire time she applied her make up. "So do you have a boyfriend or something?" I asked, trying to start a conversation. "Yeah, but I'm thinking about breaking it off. He's one of those jock kids." She says, as I fixed up her hair. "And what group do you belong in?" I asked, adding nice braids to her long blonde hair. "I don't really know, I guess I'm a little bit of everything. I get A's, love GTA, I am a cheerleader and have somewhat of a fashion sense." She explained as she applied on her pink lipstick."And what's your style?" She asked me. I honesty don't even know, I never actually put much thought into it. "I don't know, I'm a little bit of everything too I guess." I replied, I was finally done with her hair. "I'm ready! Let's get going." She said, as we walked down the stairs.

We got in Catharines car and drove to the mall, on the way I was almost sure I saw Lucy Hale walking out of the super market. "Did I just see Lucy Hale walking out of a store?!" I asked. "Yeah I guess this part of Los Angeles is like a celebrity hot spot. Most of the other actual important people are in Hollywood." She explains, making me frown; I quite like Lucy Hale and think she's important.

We finally got to the mall and walked into Victorias Secret, looking through perfume samples. "So have you and Niall had sex yet?" She asked, making me jerk my head to where she was. "Of course not, it's way too early! Plus I'm a virgin and I'm not losing it that easily." I explained, looking through the samples of moisturizers. "Well damn, I'm eighteen and I lost mine when I was sixteen to some random guy in the block." Said Catharine. "But why? You don't seem like that type of girl to just-" she cut me off before I could finish. "They type that sleeps around with random guys? Well I guess you thought wrong. I don't know if you notice but before Greg came around there wasn't really anyone to teach me about guys and how they can be jerks. All I had was a mom that didn't act like one until she met her second husband." She snapped, realizing what she had just said to me and calmed down a bit. "Look I'm sorry, it's just that my dad wasn't the best dad, and my mom wasn't there when I needed her. But she's here now, so it's okay I guess." She bluntly said, trying to change the subject. I could relate to her in so many ways. We were both alone in a cruel world, not ready to grow up, and had a dark past. I understand her and I can relate to her more than I can relate to Julie; which I've known for a year.

"I want you to know that I understand what you went through. My dad left me when I was only twelve, my mom died of cancer only about a month ago, and I hate to admit this but the only reason I'm alive right now is because of the love I got from Louis and Niall." I explained. "I guess we have more common than we thought." She said, giving me a smile as we continued our shopping. After a few more hours of shopping we decided to go home, it was almost time for dinner anyways.

When we got home dinner was ready and dad and Elizabeth were sitting in dining room already by the time we walked in. "Hey guys, come eat." My dad said. We both sat down, starting to eat our meal. The more I stared at my dad the more he disgusted me, the woman he had a child with and was previously married to died a month ago and he's acting like nothing happened. He keeps ignoring the fact that she died, and the fact that he completely abandoned me for nine years. "So we are planing on getting a deck for the backyard." He said, like it was the most important thing going on right now. "How can you do that?" I asked, narrowing my eyes at him as he gave me a confused look. "Do what sweetheart?" He asked, trying to act innocent. "Pretend like nothing happened. Mom died three fucking weeks ago and here you are talking about your god damn deck!" I said, raising my voice a little, causing Elizabeth to look quite nervous; Catharine didn't look the least bit surprised, like she would've done the same thing if she was me. "I'm not pretend to do anything Maria, I feel bad that she died but I learned to move on and maybe you should too." He said calmly. "Oh shut the fuck up! Enough with the "we need to move on"! You act like you've been through something, well guess what? I'm the one without a mother, I'm the one who wasn't raised with a dad for half my life, and I'm the one going through the pain! You have nothing to move on from! So don't you fucking dare try to tell me to forget all the shit that happened because I can't, I FUCKING CANT!" I yelled, my hands starting to shake as I stood up. "Thank you Elizabeth, the food was great." I said after a moment of silence and coughs her giving me a apologetic smile before I ran upstairs. I hear Catharine following me from behind, as I heard the distant voices of my dad arguing with Elizabeth.

I jumped on my bed and cried, and cried as Catharine comforted me. "It's okay, he deserved that." She whispered, embracing me in a hug. I missed Niall so much, I wish he was here right how, comforting me and telling me everything would be okay. I can't stand this house, knowing I'm living under the same roof as the man who abandoned me for another family. After leaving for New York i will lose all contact with him, making sure he never reaches out to me again. I don't need him in my life.

I wiped away tears and thanked Catharine for everything. After she left to go to bed I headed into the bathroom, locking the door behind me as I cried even more. I cried and cried, until my eyes were red and puffy, and I had a headache. I changed into my pajamas afterwards and got under the covers, but I couldn't sleep. The entire night I thought about how my life might've turned out better if I had a different dad; a better one.