Story of a Wallflower : Freshman Year

May 10, 2016

I have never been as mad as I am right at this very moment. I am so mad and surprisingly this is the first time I don't was to kill myself because of my anger.

My whole day was going perfectly until fourth period; I actually put effort into my outfit today and I talk to Daniel before school (we didn't talk about anything important but I would rather say two words to him than to not say anything to him,) I took my first end of the year final, which was Algebra 2/ Trigonometry, in third period...I felt like I did really good on it.

During third period I found out D- on my final. I was super shocked that I got a D-. I though the lowest grade I would get was a B+. This test brought my grade from an A to a B-. I also found out Cindy didn't start the group project we were assigned two weeks ago and its due Monday. For the project we have to Translate Romeo & Juliet, make a storyboard, a movie poster, and a portfolio for the whole play, and then we have to perform a play in front of my class...kill me now.

After fourth period we have lunch. I originally wasn't hanging out with Cindy. I was hanging out another group of friends. She came over to us and told me to come with her because she wants to hang out with me. I decided to hang out with her because I had no reason not to. We didn't really talk much until three of our other friends came. When they came I put my backpack and phone next to Cindy so I could stand up and mess around with my other friends.

Cindy stayed on the bench and stayed quiet while everyone else was just joking around and having fun. Each of the three girls play a sport: Alexandra (soccer), Natalia (cheer), Abbey (gymnastics). We like to play around and say that Alex would survive a Zombie Apocalypse because she is the fastest, Natalia is a banshee in another dimension because she is loud, and Abbey would know all of the crazy sex positions because she is super flexible, I would be the only one who would survive a Tsunami or because I am the best swimmer.

So Natalia asked me if I was going to do all-star cheer for the following season. I told her that I didn't know but if I do it would be a team in Valencia, Ca. They are really good and one of my very first cheer friend. She also goes to Diamond Mountain High but we don't talk anymore because at the beginning of the year Peter told her mean things about me and told her she shouldn't hang out with me. Anyways, back to the story.

After I answered Natalia's question Cindy said, "No, you can't! You aren't a good enough cheerleader to cheer for them. You wouldn't even make it on their Senior level 1 team" For those of you that don't know the basics to all-star cheer, senior is the age group for the division... (you have to be 15-18 to be on the senior team). The levels tell you what the difficulty of the stunts and tumbling (cartwheels, tucks, backhand springs etc.) could be. The lower the level the easier stunts would have to be. If anyone tells a cheerleader she is a level one, that's a huge insult.

So after that, Cindy and I started to argue. She kept telling she was a better cheerleader than me which was physically impossible because she injured her leg like three times within the last six months and I have cheer much longer than her. The thing I hate most about Cindy is how she always says she's a better cheerleader, barrel racer, swimmer, and dancer than me. The only one that is true is the barrel racing because I don't like to ride horses. My family used to love riding horses and going to rodeos... but I never grew a liking to it. Ever since we moved into the suburbs, we stopped living the country life. Cindy never swam competitively before nor has she danced competitively before. Cindy is all bark but no bite and I hate that. All she ever does is discourage me and talk me down.

After our argument got very hostile, I grabbed my backpack and walked away and went over to the friends I was hanging out with early. We only had like three minutes left for lunch so I didn't talk to them much.

When the bell rang the first thing I did was grab my back pocket for my phone, but it wasn't there. When I realized I didn't have it, I knew Sydney had it. I walked quickly to the locker room and went straight to Cindy.

"Where is it?" I yelled in a firm voice.

"What do you mean? She began to smile and laugh.

"Stop messing around Cindy. I know you have my phone. Now just give it to me." I said with my teeth clenched my teeth tightly together.

"I put it on my horses that I don't know where your phone is." Cindy loves her horses with her dear life but I could see the look in her eye that she was lying. She walked over to the water fountain and began to drink water. I started yelling at her to give me my phone. Then I just lost my patience.

I pushed her head down into the water fountain so water could get on her face instead of her mouth. There was about a five second delay before she got up from the fountain and when she did she had a mouth full of water that she spits directly into my face.

Spitting is an extreme pet peeve of mine. I hate it when people spit more than when people smell like B.O. (two of which I hate a lot) Last time someone spit on me at school was in 2nd grade. She was my friend and we were sitting on the bus together. I didn't know why she did it. We weren't arguing or anything but she spits on me. When I got home my mom took me to the nail salon. On our way there she asked me how my day was and I said, "It was pretty good, but one of my friends spit on me." My mom quickly stopped the car when I said that told me to tell her what happen. Shortly after she called the school. The next day at recess the principal went up to us and gave us a little lecture on spitting. Ever since that day I hated spitting and ever since that day I haven't talk to her...That is kind of a big deal because in second grade we would hate each other one minute but be best friends after that, but that wasn't the case.

So, after Cindy spit on me I snapped like a twig and went into "full rage mode." I went to the fountain to fill my mouth with water. At the same time, Cindy was trying to dunk my head into the fountain. She wasn't very successful because I had my leg up in the air, blocking her from getting close. When I was done filling my mouth up with water I turned around to spit back on her. As I was spitting out she turned around and began to run the other way, but it was too late. The water got all over her hair. I got Cindy really pissed when I did that because she has EXTREMELY curly hair and she like to flat iron it. So once I got the hair wet she began to resemble a lion. I am guessing that is went she snapped because she laughs and giggles turned into a look of death. She pushed me in the wall and I pushed her into the trash can. "None of this would have happened if you just gave me my fucking phone." She walked away from me after. I was kind of sad because I was ready to physically fight. This kind of weird for me to say because I am a pacifist and I never fought anyone. This was the 2nd time I ever wanted to severely fight someone (The first time was about a week about, but I'll explain that later.)

I haven't talk to Cindy since that moment...which was exactly 9 hours ago. I honestly don't want to ever talk to her again. This was the last straw but it is hard because I sit next to her in all classes we have together and we have this huge project in English coming up and my birthday is Thursday. Cindy told me she had plans of getting me a good gift, but I doubt that is still going to happen. I am going to try and avoid her as much as I can.

I didn't write about the past few weeks because I didn't have enough time to , but within the next few days I should write about the events that happened. But nothing drastically horrible happened.....nor nothing monumental.