Courage (Klaine fanfic)

Chapter 47

It's bad to go to sleep angry because in the event that you don't wake up, you could die pissed and that's not good. I know that, my mom took me to church and that's in the Bible. You could go to hell because your soul is so fucked up by going to sleep angry.

I tried to not to be mad. I really did. But wait, I'm not mad at Kurt. I'm not even pissed at him. I'm hurt beyond words and it's like my heart has been ripped out of my chest and stomped on by him.

So when I woke up the next morning, holding him, I wasn't happy. Well I was happy, but I wasn't as happy I should be to wake up next to my pregnant fiancé. Today was going to be a lazy day, but it didn't feel right with him in my arms. I still needed some time alone to think.

I got up, grabbing my phone, and walked to the guest room. I walked in and fell on the bed, closing my eyes. It seemed that all I wanted to do was sleep. Turning my phone on silent, I got under all the cover and went back to a dreamless sleep.

*********

"Blaine! Blaine!" I heard Kurt screaming my name.

I rolled over, groaning.

He must have heard me because he came in the room. Fuck! Can he just leave me alone?

"Running away from your problems won't fix them Blaine!" he shouted from the doorway.

I sat up and glared at him and then at my phone. It was 10:17. Granted I should be up, but this was a lazy day and sleep is all I wanted to do right now.

"Are you fucking serious, Kurt? I'm not running away from shit! I can't run away from it because it's here, with me 24 fucking 7. I love you and our baby, okay? I really do, but you don't seem to think that I want our baby and I'm done trying to convince that I do. Now, I want to sleep. I'm emotionally and mentally drained."

He looked at me with shocked and horror in his eyes. I should feel bad, I should hurt because I'm making him feel this way, but right now I can't.

"Blaine, can we just talk about this?" he whispered.

"What's to talk about? You are convinced that I don't want the baby no matter how many times I say that I do. There's nothing else to discuss."

"Yes there is. How about you being pissed as fuck at me right now? Or how about you treating me like I'm your fucking roommate instead of your fucking pregnant fiancé?" he basically spat those words at me.

I got up and walked over to him. Instead of him backing away like he did yesterday, he stood his ground, staring at me, challenging me. I liked that.

"I'm treating you like a roommate? I'm pissed as fuck at you?" I asked, crossing my arms across my chest.

He blinked a few times, trying to hold back his tears I think. "Yes."

"No. I told you I'm not mad because I'm not mad at you, Kurt. I'm not. I have no reason to be mad at you. I told you what I am," I said softly.

"Hurt," he whispered.

I nodded.

"Why?"

I looked at him like he was crazy. "Why?! You asked why I'm hurt?" I chuckled darkly, his eyes got wide. "I'm hurt because you accused me of. Not. Wanting. Our. Fucking. Baby!"

"Stop cussing and yelling at me!" he screamed. "I'm sorry! Okay. I'm sorry. I'm just so scared! This is so fucking scary for me Blaine!" he had started crying.

"Scared of what? I'm going to be here for you! And you know that. I'm not a fucking dead beat! But if that's what you want me to be I can be."

"Fuck Blaine! I know that but it's still scary. You're not carrying this baby, I am. You don't have morning sickness, I do. You're body doesn't get messed, mine does! You don't experience none of that but I do. That's why I'm scared. I am responsible for this life inside of me, me and me alone. I can't take the baby out and give it to you when I want a break from being pregnant."