Chapter 12

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by narrymemikey

by narrymemikey

Niall
.............................

I know I shouldn't have said those things. I'm a monster. I can't believe I did that. Actually ya I can. Because I'm a horrible person. Yet she doesn't think so. Well didn't. Now she probably realized how terrible I am. How scary and cruel. I guess it's best for her though. She doesn't need someone like me to ruin her life. To ruin her.

I still wish I wouldn't have done it. She must hate me.

"Ugh!" I try to pull out my hair. I'm a fucking idiot!

I need to let this anger out... I pick up my chair and chuck it at the wall. Knock over my desk. I punch the wall.

I hate myself.

My room looks like a tornado hit but I don't give a shit. I can't believe I hurt her. I made her cry.

Ok I need to sit down and think.

Think niall. How can you make up for this? Think. Think. Think!

October
..................................

I feel soft lips press against my forehead, as I sleep. I can feel a hand stroke the tears off my cheeks then trace my lips. I feel the same soft lips kiss my nose. I can feel a lip ring. Niall. Niall is doing this. It takes everything not to open my eyes.

"I'm so sorry." He whispers.

Then I hear him walk out and I sit straight up. I can't believe that Just happened. Niall. Niall just appologized. For what though? Yelling at me yesterday maybe? He shouldn't be sorry in that case. He was just telling me the truth.

I lay back down and go to grab my iPhone from the bedside table and feel an envelope.

I sit up again and take a look. There's a white envelope and a bracelet on top. I pick up the bracelet first.

It's a simple little silver thing with a single charm on it. The charm is a simple little bird hanging alone. I slip it on with the rest of my bracelets. It's simple but beautiful.

I then remember the letter. I carefully open it and pull out the letter.

It reads:

October,

I'm so sorry I said all of those things. I wasn't thinking straight, I never can when I'm around you. I know this probably isn't enough, and I'm not worth it, but please forgive me. I'm sorry. If anything those words should have been directed at me.

- Niall

I read it over and over again. This is enough. This is more than enough. How can he even think I wouldn't forgive him. I wasn't crying because hurt me. I was crying because they were true. How can he not see that?

I wipe my tears away and slip the letter back in the envelope and hide it away at the bottom of the drawer.

I still can't believe Niall did that for me. I can't believe he thinks he's not worth my forgiveness. I look at the little bird hanging from the chain on my wrist.

I have to tell him. Tell him he is worth it. If he did all this to say I'm sorry. To me. Me. He is definitely worth it. I decide that moment that after everything everybody tells me about Niall he is a good person. He just doesn't show it. He does have feelings. He does. He is good. And I'm gonna make him and everyone else believe it. One way or another I will redeem Niall Horan.

K sorry it was short but if anyone is actually reading this could you comment? Cause it feels like I'm writing this for myself. Srsly does anybody want me to continue?