Letting Go (Niall Horan AU)

Chapter 34

October

...............

When Niall arrives he looks tired but he tries to cover it with a fake smile. He walks over to my bed kicking off his boots and lying down next to me.

"So where's the room mate?" He asks lifting an eyebrow.

"Eh Jenna said she had a family problem or something so she's staying back home for maybe a week." I answer shrugging.

"Hmmmm..." Niall smiles evilly.

"A week huh?"

I nod.

"So that means we have the dorm to ourselves all week?" He asks another obvious question, that I had already answered in the earlier context.

"Yes, maybe a week." I reply stressing she could come back anytime.

"Does this mean you can give me an 'I'm sorry blowjob' with no interruptions?" He asks cheekily as I blush and shove him away gently.

"Absolutely no blowjob apologies in this dorm room aloud." I retort.

Niall sticks put his bottom lip, and attempts at making a puppy face, but fails with his piercings.

I lean down and kiss his protruding lip and laugh.

"So what took you so long to get here?" I ask.

Niall suddenly tenses and bites his bottom lip instead of displaying it.

"Well... I don't know."

"What do you mean? You were doing it you have to know what you were doing." I persist.

Niall's eye brows knit together in what I assume is frustration and he stares at the opposite wall.

"October please we just got done with our earlier problem can we please leave these ones in the past?" He asks stoutly.

"What do you mean 'these problems'? What did you do?" I ask more urgently getting more worried every second he tugs at his lip ring in silence.

"I... I fucked up. It meant nothing to me; I swear. It's just I got so caught up and it was so natural and I needed closure, plus I-"

"Niall slow down what the hell are you talking about?" I ask stopping his rambling.

He takes in a deep breath and sighs.

"I should've known I couldn't hide it from you forever. It's just, I didn't want you to know about my fucked up past. I want it to stay the past. But I s'pose you'd like t' know?" He asks defeated.

"Yes, Niall that's what I've been asking."

He pulls me into his lap with his broad arms, and I run my fingers through his soft hair, giving him time.

"Promise me you won't hate me?" Niall asks in a whisper against my neck.

"Niall Horan, though it may seem I do at times, I could never hate you." I reply.

He takes in another deep breath before speaking again.

"Well for you to understand what happened earlier I'll have to tell you the background knowledge."

"I've already anticipated this. Stop stalling."

"Okay.... Well Harry and I.... We've known each other longer than you think we have. Harry and I... We used to be in a relationship." He lets out the last words in a strained whisper.

"So... You guys were best friends? I get that."

"No. W-we used to be boyfriends..." He says looking up at me. In this moment he looks so defeated and small. So fragile. Something I have never once seen Niall Horan look.