When I Stop Chasing

Chapter Forty-Four

Chapter Forty-Four

Dare

After all the burden I have received these past few days ngayon lang ako nakahinga ng maluwag ulit. It feels like something big were taken out of my heart, Nabawasan, gumaan. Ang sarap sa pakiramdam.

Lahat ng bigat na dala-dala ko parang biglang naglaho. The moment my Dad wrapped his arms around me, The burden, the pain, those gloomy vibes, it flew all away. Ang sarap pala mayakap ng tatay mo, Like all the worries and pain fade away. This is the thing I missed the most. I have been away from him and his arms for years, I drifted and almost cursed him to death.

I hated his principles and almost hated all of him, But he is still my Dad. Someone who brought me here on Earth. Hindi ko inaasahan na mayayakap ko pa siya ng ganun kahigpit. I never thought nor dreamed about it dahil alam kong hindi mangyayari but I know deep inside me, The young Ofiana Margo, wants that to happen. Hindi ko man aminin ng harap-harapan pero alam ko sa puso ko na gusto ko pa rin siya mayakap, I want to feel the feeling of having a father. It's been awhile and Universe got it's very perfect timing to gave that moment to me.

When everything were slowly falling down right in front of my eyes, Universe gave me a precious moment that I would never ever forget. Everything seems not working for me right now, Everything were so fucked up and I am so near on breaking down but the moment my Dad hugged me that tight, My will to stand still and still fight with this war were being reborn.

My Dad lit up some fire inside me, A fire of willingness to survive life. A fire of perseverance to surpass the current of life. And that, That is everything to me. He is still my Dad, Atleast when everyone would shut their windows down at me I have someone who will surely welcome me with open arms and that is my parents. I really can't imagine what life would I have without them, They made me strong to live on this cruel world.

Now, I understand why they keep it that way. I now understand why their parenting were that way because they want me to be prepared for the worst of all worsts. They already made a barrier for me, They already did a prevention measures for me. Inihanda na nila ako simula noon palang and now, I grew up with enough strength to go on to life and this is something that I need to be thankful of my parents. They made me this and I am beyond thankful to them for building me like this.

I glimpse of smile slip out of my lips as I held tighter to the steering-wheel, Lumingon ako sa kanan at nahagip ng mata ko ang isang Tea shop, I suddenly felt the dryness of my throat. I bit my lip as I change my pace at unting-unting huminto sa tapat neto. I park my car parallel to the others at inilock ito.

Walang masyadong tao, The vibes of this Tea shop is so relaxing! Malapit nalang ito sa University bakit ngayon ko lang ito nakita?

The employees were all smiles so I smiled back. Wala na akong paki kung maga ba ang mata ko o ano, I might look disastrous today. Pero ngayon lang naman ito, It's been months since I had cried this hard with horrible face and puffy eyes. Wala din naman makakakilala sa akin dito kaya wala na akong paki kung anuman ang itsura ko ngayon. I ordered a lemon iced tea to refresh my throat from severe dryness because of crying, Hindi na ako umupo pa at lumabas na kaagad.

I saw a pet shop na katabi ng tea shop na ito bago ako pumasok and I wanted to check it. I want to have a pet, I think having a pet is really a life decision. A decision you need to think of for a hundred and thousand of times, Kaya hanggang ngayon ay pinagiisipan ko pa ito. I've read some blogs before that having some pets on your home can lessen the stress of the people who lives in that house. Gusto ko ng aso!