Just Me

chapter20

Alex

It would've been better if I just passed out after all that happened but no, I'm totally aware of what's happening around me. Everything is still clearly registering in my brain, though I don't want to completely absorb and comprehend anything right now.

I stayed silent as we made our way back to the camp. Rimmo and Lance took care of almost everything after what occured between me and Xander. I wasn't much of a help after all. Too many things happened all at once and I can't help myself but worry about it. I let go of a sigh.

I looked around me, moments ago everything's fine. Bakit kailangang may mangyaring ganito? Bakit ngayon pa?

I saw Jem walking towards me, concern clearly plastered on his face.

"Alex, ano. Gusto mo ba sumama samin sa hospital? Pero kung ayaw mo at gusto mo na umuwi okay lang din naman, hihintayin ka na lang namin hanggang masundo ka ng kuya mo. Prince insisted na samahan namin sila Sophia at Ken, hindi pa rin kasi ma-contact ang parents nila unfortunately hindi naman pwedeng sumama ang Lolo nila" mahinahon nyang sabi.

"Si Xander?" Alam kong ang layo ng sagot ko sa tanong n'ya pero yun ang unang lumabas sa bibig ko.

"Hindi namin alam. Sabi ni Rimmo nandito lang daw sya kanina kaso ngayong hinahanap namin sya hindi naman namin sya makita. We tried calling him pero cannot be reached e".

"Ah, sige sama na lang ako sa inyo" I gave him a smile. He smiled back and reached for my hand.

***

When I opened my eyes we were already at the hospital. Nakatulog na pala ako sa mga upuan. Halata sa mga mukha nila ang pagod but no one complained. I sat up and ran my fingers through my hair. I feel sticky and I smell awful. Shet ang dugyot ko na. I smiled to myself on that supposedly private joke when someone came up to me.

"Gusto kong maligo" seryoso kong sabi sa kanya.

"I agree. Kailangan mo na ngang maligo, umaalingasaw na yang baho mo dito sa hallway" he said sarcastically.

"Psh. Kala mo naman hindi sya dugyot" sabi ko sabay irap.

"Atleast gwapo, so hindi masyado halata haha" sabi nya sabay upo sa tabi ko.

I punched him playfully on his arm.

"Baliw" sabi ko sabay ngiti sa kanya ng nakakaloko.

After that we were silent for a while until he spoke.

"Alex?"

"Hmm?" I said turning to face Lance.

Yes. Lance. I don't know why my heart sank deeper. Maybe I'm expecting him to show up instead.

"About sa inyo ni Xander..." sabi nya na halatang naguguluhan sa nangyari.

I didn't respond that's why he said, "Okay lang naman, kung ayaw mong pag-usapan".

Hindi agad ako nakasagot but somehow I found the courage to speak.

" I had a bestfriend, Daniel. He's my only friend back then.. " I started.

"Oh? May kaibigan ka pala? haha" he said trying to make the conversation lighter.

"Gusto mo ituloy ko o wag na lang?" sabi ko naman sa kanya nang nangaasar.

"Sabi ko nga shut up na lang ako e, sige continue" he said while making face.

Bastos talaga to.

"So as I was saying, I had a bestfriend, Daniel, but he died three years ago. It's all because of me. I tried to move on but I can't even if I want to. I have hyperthemesia it's a condition almost the same as photographic memory which makes it impossible for me to forget. And then there's L..."