today was one of those days that i wished to stay in the dorm and just cradle into a ball. But I had no option since we had a concert today. As much as I loathed to leave, many people were expecting me. I can't let them down, the way she did to me.
"Jungkook, kaja" says Taehyung with his arm hanging around my shoulder.
I nod dully and followed him out of the dorm along with the rest of the members whom were looking out for me. I really appreciated their efforts, it made me feel less lonely.
Although, I never spoken a word with anyone aside from that time with Namjoon. They understood though, so no one pressured me.
We arrived at the massive venue where many cars were parked. All seven of us got out of the van and walked inside the venue with heads down, due to the paparazzi and sasaeng fans.
I was the last to get inside while my fellow members were already in the dressing room. I felt myself get unsteady, like I was nauseous and my head pounding in heavy pain.
The guards took me to the dressing room, but everything was a blur. I felt hella light headed and would pass out anytime soon.
"Jungkook, gawenchanha?" was it Yoongi? I had no idea who was talking to me.
My foot straddled together as I felt my body fall to the ground rather harshly before I drifted into a pitch of darkness.
---
My eyes flutter open as I was greeted with several faces in front of me. I was confused while looking at each of their expressions. My body felt numb while sweat trickled down my face, remembering what had just happened to me awhile ago.
"Gwaenchanha?" asks Taehyung,
I slowly get up while my face scrunched up in pain, steadying myself on spot in case I felt nauseous again.
"What do you feel?"
"Have you eaten?" asks Namjoon whom looked more concerned then the rest.
I just look down and lightly shook my head. I refused to always eat, but Jimin forces me to as he sent me snacks in my room. He knew I wouldn't bother to touch them so he would stay until I finished.
"Aish! Are you out of your mind? you can't perform with an empty stomach, especially after you had passed out!" exclaims Namjoon,
the lads trying to calm him down while Taehyung and Hoseok stayed beside me. I felt like all I ever recieved from Namjoon was a lecture or a shout. That these past days, he seemed more stressed out and hot tempered.
I had no idea why, but I partially felt like part of it was me. What else could there be? despite how I'm the only one who he looses his temper on. I couldn't understand, but it was fairly wrong. Was I at fault?
Shortly, Jimin came running inside with a plastic bag and handing it to me.
"Eat up." he says,
Jimin treated me like he was my eomma. He was in charge of giving me food daily, not that I mind or anything. It just fulfilled me that he cares so much.
I started eating up and took big spoonful of bites as the food consisted many savoury flavours that I enjoyed. I haven't eaten this much the whole week and it felt so pleasuring having a full stomach.
The boys watched me eat in surprise since it was the first I've eaten a lot in days. In under a few minutes, I already finished eating and I felt satisfied. The pain and nausea slowly vanishing.
"Kamsahmnida." i say.
if it meant pretending to be okay and happy, i'm willing to do it. I don't want others to pity and treat me differently. Especially them, whom have been stressing about me lately. They didn't show no signs, but I knew.
I mean who wouldn't be stressed with me? especially in a situation like this.
