What It's Like Loving an Idiot

Five || Drunk Grant

I raise an eyebrow at him, "What?"

"I was just wondering," he replies.

Well great, I know that he's been acting quite weird whenever I bring Ryder up or say anything about him. I just thought that it wouldn't have been bring it up here.

I glance at Grayson and funny enough, his eyes are wide. He stands up and pulls Leah up with him. It's like he sensed a dangerously dramatic situation. I'm surprised he didn't pass out or something...

Anyways, back to James's jealously problem.

I lean in closer to him so I can hear him. "What is your problem with Ryder."

He doesn't say anything; he just sits there with a distressed expression.

I pull at his sleeve; he looks at me. "James, I'm serious."

He nods. "I know, I just..." He doesn't finish his sentence like it's okay not to.

I wait for him to finish.

"I don't want to lose you."

I'm confused. I do not understand why he would think something like that. "Why would you even be worried about something like that?" I ask him.

He stands up, "Come on," he holds out his hand for me.

I stand up without out asking for an explanation. I know exactly what he's doing. The truth is that I can't hear him over the music either.

We step outside. If you think that it's a warm winter night, you'd be wrong, oh very terribly wrong. All I am wearing is a long sleeve shirt and you'd think that maybe that would keep me a bit warmer. Nope, not even close.

"Listen, Vena, with all this shit going on, it's been hard to hold on to you. I don't know, I feel like you're going to leave me or something, just to get away from all this. I don't blame you either. This is a fucked up situation and it's not like you can control it. I just want you to be with me, but I-,"I put my hand over his mouth to shut up his babbling. Blah, blah, blah.

"Just hold on. Can you tell me what this has to do with Ryder?"

He sighs. "I just think that you're going to leave me and go to him. I mean, it's not like he has these problems."

"Ryder? Like our friend Ryder? The guy that sleeps with a different girl every night? That Ryder?" I ask him. I mean, I hope Ryder stopped sleeping around, but like I have mentioned, I have no damn idea where he went.

"Vena, I know it's ridiculous. I just think you'll get too stressed or pissed off enough that you'll go to him."

His whole dilemma kind of cracks me up. "Don't you think that if I wanted to leave you, I would have already done it?"

He raises his attention to me.

"I mean, I've had plenty of chances, but you see, James, I don't run out on people who I love and care about because that's not what I do. You're not supposed to run out on people you care about, especially when they love you the most. And James, I love you, more than you will ever fully understand," I smile at him.

He pulls me into his arms and holy shit is he ever cold. I look up at him. "Y'know, it is actually an insult that you think I would do that," I joke.

He kisses the top of my head, "I love you so much, Vena. I really do."

I smile, "I know, now let's go inside. I think my boobs are going to fall off."

He chuckles, "Wouldn't want that, would we?"