What It's Like Loving an Idiot

Forty One || Where I'm Coming From (James's Point of View)

James's Point of View

How do you explain something that's supposed to be so simple when you have absolutely no idea how to say it or if you even should? What do you do if the person you're saying this to means the world to you and the thing you need to say is the last thing they want to hear?

Can someone tell me what to do? Because I haven't got a clue.

~

"Yeah, we were planning on heading over there after class anyways," Grant answers Leah's question. "You do remember you have a shift right?"

She nods, "Yes, Grant. I remember that I have a shift for my job that is my responsibility," she answers with the utmost amount of sarcasm.

He rolls his eyes and turns away from her to find someone else, but by the looks of it, it's looking like he isn't having any luck.

"Who are you looking for?" Vena asks him as she looks up at him. I smile by just the look of her. I can't explain it— her absolute beauty, I mean. The way her brown hair hangs just below her shoulders and it's always soft even when she hasn't showered in two days. How? I'm not exactly sure, but it always is. I could go on for days talking about how extraordinary she is, but I don't think that would be ideal for my health. I mean, is sleep deprivation really the answer to really get you to understand how much I adore her? I do suppose that I can tell you about her eyes before I stop tuning my friends out. Her eyes, God, they're this perfect shade of blue. I mean, you're probably sitting there thinking 'there is no perfect shade of a color', but that's just it, you're wrong because there is. It's her eyes. It's that sort of blue that you wouldn't believe is possible on a person just because it is so extraordinary and out of the ordinary. They are what every—

"James?"

I blink and remember where I am again. I mean, I knew where I was, but I guess I didn't fully comprehend that I was so out of it that someone was trying to get my attention.

"Yes?" I say.

Vena looks at me with a slight smirk on her face, "Do you want to join us?" she asks me as she looks at me awaiting my answer. In front of us, I notice that our friends have already begun to walk down the sidewalk, but Vena waited for me.

I nod, "Yeah, let's go," I move my crutches and start walking with Vena.

She smiles, sliding her hands into her sweater pockets. "You okay?"

I look at her, but also trying to pay attention, so I don't fall flat on my face because, well, that wouldn't be ideal for me. "Yeah, Babe, I'm okay. How about you?"

We walk down the sidewalk in absolutely no hurry to catch up with our friends. In fact, I have no clue where they are going. I mean, I can see them in the distance, but I'm sure that Vena knows where they are going because chances are she was listening when I wasn't. I notice a smile on her face as she looks down at the sidewalk. She turns her head to look at me, "I'm okay," she answers with a soft smile playing on her full lips.

I can't decide if I believe her or not, so instead, we walk.

~

"I'm sorry, but I'm not. You're wrong, you are so incredibly wrong."

Ryder scoffs at his sister, "You think you are so fucking smart because you took AP in high school. Sorry to break it to you but this isn't high school anymore, Leah," he spouts from across the dining table.

She shakes her head like as if Ryder has absolutely no idea what he's talking about. Chances are, he doesn't. "That's just it, Ryder. I am smart and you aren't. Do you understand that? Or do you need me to explain each singular word to you?"