Fire Extinguished (Flaming Desire Book 1) A Katniss and Finnick FanFiction

Chapter 5

Katniss POV

I don't what's happening to me. I am the Girl on Fire right? I don't know anymore. Without Peeta. Without Prim. Without everyone I love, my fire has burned out.

At least I have Finnick. I know I can trust him now. I don't know why, but after hearing the truth, everything he did for me and Peeta in the games, proved his loyalty. Plus, he is the only one here for me. Haymitch is also here for me, but not in the way Finnick is. He really does understand me in a way Haymitch wouldn't know or even care about.

On one side, I am mad at him for holding me last night. I don't want him there in Peeta's place. He will never be able to replace Peeta. Last night, he reminded me of Peeta so much, I hated it. It reminded me that Peeta is dead. Because of me. Because of my rebellion. Because I am the Mockingjay, Peeta is dead.

At another side, I'm thankful he held me last night. When he held me last night, it reminded me of Peeta. It reminded me of his sweetness. Of how he loved me and how I loved him. I know now that if I had the choice, I would always pick Peeta over Gale. It's too late now.

I guess you never really know what you have until you lose it. I never really knew, I loved Peeta until he died. When Finnick held me last night, it also reminded me that I haven't lost him or Haymitch. It reminded me that he was there for me and that I wasn't the only one scarred by the games or by the deaths of our loved ones. I reminded me that I wasn't the only one suffering from the result of my actions.

Finnick is holding me right now. My head is on his shoulder and he is caressing my hair. I can't stop myself from sobbing on Finnick's shoulder. Just crying on him makes it even worse. It reminds me that Peeta is not here to be there for me anymore.

After a few minutes, I start to calm down. We ended up just holding each other for a while until he says, "We should head to the control room. Haymitch will be wondering where we are."

We enter the control room and we find Haymitch and Plutarch. Next to them is a figure. It is laying down and it is covered in a white sheet.

"Who is that?" I whisper. I point at the figure draped in white.

"Beetee. We got him out but he was dead by then."

I am frozen. I can't move. There is a body of a dead tribute a few feet away from me.

"What are you going to do to him?" I croak.

"We have decided to burn him" Plutarch replies.

"What are you going to to with his ashes?"

"We're going to release them in the air sweetheart." Haymitch states it like its the obvious.

"Oh," I start shaking slightly.

"What do you need us here for?" Finnick saves me from talking. I barely notice that he has moved beside me.

"Things," Haymitch sighs. He has another liquor bottle in his hand.

Plutarch cuts in, "We wanted to update you on our status with the rebellion. You are the Mockingjay after all Katniss."

"Right," I say with no emotion. Sometimes I'm tired of being the Mockingjay.

"All the Districts are fighting so far. Some instantly joined while others took some time to. District Eleven joined instantly, while One and Two took some convincing, but all that matters is that everyone has joined in on the rebellion. Some Capitol people joined in too after Peeta told the whole world that you were "pregnant" and you guys got "married." There are just some things that are too horrible that not even the Capitol people will stand for it."

"The Capitol people. What are they doing right now?" I am curious to find out what happened.

"Unfortunately, Capitol people weren't that smart about it. They rebelled in a way that got them killed."

"Oh," I say again. It seems that I am running out of words. Finnick saves me. Again. "So how's our progress? What do you want me and Katniss to do?"

"So far we are winning. There are many more district people than Peacekeepers, so that's a plus. And for what we want you two to do is," he trails off.

"Stay alive. Especially you Katniss." Haymitch buts in. And with that he leaves the room.

"What Haymitch said, but we also want you to keep doing what you've been doing. Rebel. Give people hope. Be their Mockingjay," Plutarch adds, "The screen over there," he points to a large screen on the side of the wall, "shows you what's happening throughout the world. Feel free to look at it. It also shows past previews," he looks at me when he says that. I know what he means. Peeta's last moments of life. They are on that screen. I need to see what happened.

Plutarch leaves before saying, "Katniss, be careful on what you watch on that. Sometimes, we don't need to see the things meant for us. And get some sleep you two. You look like you haven't slept in days."

That's because we haven't. I've been crying on Finnick for me to go to sleep. It makes me feel guilty. I've deprived Finnick from sleep.

"Katniss," Finnick snaps me out of my trance, "Are you going to watch the video?"

I nod, still staring at the same spot I did ever since Plutarch left.

"Do you want me to stay with you?"

"No" I whisper.

I know I will need him, but I want to watch the video alone. It somehow feels personal to me and I don't want him to help me while watching the video. Although I appreciate his help, I don't want to get to attach. I don't want to rely on him, like I relied on Peeta. Losing another person like that would just hurt too much.

He walks out of the room and I walk over to the screen. I scroll down through past broadcasts until I find Peeta's. I walk over to a chair and curl up in it. Then I press play. The video has begun.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

AN: I'm sorry if some people are out of character.