fanboy ↦ michael clifford {au}

prologue: tears me up

PROLOGUE:

| michael's pov |

I had my head in my hands, suffering these chest pains I never thought I would feel. My hair was a mess; I actually felt like my fringe was a nuisance, for once. My eyes were tired from staring at my laptop's screen for so long, but I just couldn't stop. It was like this was how my life was for the past few months, and I could guarantee it would be, for the coming months and even years.

I could laugh at myself for turning out this way; I used to be so different. I always felt like I could sleep for centuries, and I'd never find myself staying up to scroll through pictures and watch videos. The only thing I would stay up for was video games.

Maybe she was kind of like video games to me. She was an addiction, of some sort. Obsession, even. I could never get enough of her. Every little thing she did or say made me like her more and more.

The feelings I have for her are growing, and I hated it. Life was so simple before she came into the picture. She turned everything upside down. All these sleepless nights and bottled-up emotions were because of her.

She hurt me in a way no one else can.

It hurts because I think I love her.

It hurts even more because she'll never know how much she means to me.

But it tears me up inside because she doesn't even know I exist.