fanboy ↦ michael clifford {au}

thirteen: option

CHAPTER THIRTEEN:

| michael’s pov |

“You’re so quiet, Mikey,” Ashton slurred as I tried to hold him up. Even though I didn’t want to take care of him, I had to.

I couldn’t risk having him stay over at the hotel. 

I was being selfish and probably unreasonable, but no, I don’t want him to be there. I don’t want him to be near her.

He laughed when we almost tripped over the steps of his house, annoying me. 

“Shut up, would you?” I said, my teeth gritting. 

He huffed, and I could’ve sworn he rolled his eyes at me. He dropped himself on his couch, instantly lifting weight off me.

As soon as I saw he was fine, I went straight for the door. 

“Wait, wait,” he frantically called out, as if he had something important to tell me. I suppose it wasn’t as relevant as he thinks it is, but I faced him to listen. 

He was drunk, I’m pretty sure it was a stupid secret of his.

“Does Belle like you yet? Does she?” 

And at times like these, I was grateful that he lived alone. No one would hear him ask such an idiotic question. Except the idiot, himself.

The idiot was, surprisingly, me. 

Exhaling a deep breath, I shook my head. “Go to sleep; I’ll get to you tomorrow. I hope you’re sober, by then.”

He laughed some more, then started to talk and talk, without pausing. I couldn’t understand him anymore, though. All I knew was that it had something to do with love, which I was sick of. 

So, I left him there, talking to himself. I could have stayed with him and actually try to comprehend his words, but I was far too tired. Too much things happened today.

Tomorrow would be a new day, wherein I would forget I met Belle. Tomorrow, I would do what I’ve always done– run a blog, write my thoughts, dream. Tomorrow, I would be back to my old self. I’d be enclosed in my own little world, where I was a little bit happy. 

But it would be like any other day, I’m sure. 

It would be a day where I’ll feel insecure, where I’ll feel useless and alone. But it’s not like I wasn’t used to being disregarded.

It would just affect me more than any other day, because in the back of my mind, I wished things turned out differently today.

I wished she saw me as an option.