fanboy ↦ michael clifford {au}

twenty: if

CHAPTER TWENTY:

| michael’s pov |

My phone lit up. Someone was calling me, and for once, it isn’t Ashton. An unknown number was what was there, making me wonder who it was.

Thinking it wouldn’t kill me to answer, I picked it up, and my jaw tightened at the voice.

Belle.

“Hi, Michael? I… well, I didn’t really expect you to answer, but you did. That’s nice,” she muttered, under her breath. 

I didn’t say a word, choosing to listen to what she had to say.

She hummed, probably thinking. “Ashton’s worried about you.”

If I could scoff, I would have. Of course, it was about him. When was it not about him?

I couldn’t believe I was still this affected by the situation, when I clearly had no right to be.

But that’s the life of a fan– you’re always, somehow, wishing it was you. 

Finally noticing the silence and her words, she added, “A-and me, too! I’m worried about you, too.” She sounded unsure, and it was like a punch to my gut. 

Because I knew that wasn’t true. Ashton just probably asked her to call me up, because he knows I can’t hang up on her.

And that was mainly because I was hung up on her.

“Michael?” I could imagine her waving a hand, as if I was right in front of her. The thought made me feel a tad bit better. 

“Yeah,” I respond, my voice low. I don’t know if she realized it was a mix of annoyance and distress. 

“I hope you two talk soon. Sorry for taking up your time, okay? Hope I’ll see you again.” And she ended the call.

I couldn’t believe her as easy as before. All I could think about was how, maybe, just maybe, she was in Ashton’s arms right now. 

Maybe they were holding hands, laughing to each other. They wouldn’t think about me, and how I probably felt bad. I wasn’t as important.

It weighed me down and angered me. 

He didn’t love her, why did he deserve that? Why did she deserve that?

If she was mine, I’d love her.