Anthology

[AU ficlet] Like Rabbits (Rolesh)

Prompt: both stuck in the condo lobby because their respective roommates needed "alone time"

Day 11 of my October Ficlet Writing Challenge. Kamusta naman, hindi ko na naman napanindigan 'to hahaha

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"Fuck yes, Andreau! Right there!"

"Want more, babe? Harder?"

"Y-yeah harder! Shit!"

"You feel so good, Zades. Fuck!"

Kulang na lang ipasak na ni Kesh ang foam ng inuupuan niyang sofa sa mga tenga niya. Good God, her poor ears. Halos araw-araw nang natu-torture ang buong pagkatao niya sa dirty talk at kung ano pang sex sounds ng roommate niyang si Zade at ng boyfriend/neighbor nilang si Andreau. Wala nang silbi ang ear plugs na binili niya last week. Tumatagos pa rin ang ingay ng dalawa.

She couldn't help but blame herself for this one. Siya 'tong pumilit kay Zade na subukang lumandi six months ago. Gusto lang naman niyang makita na ma-in love ang roommate niya... at mafulfull din ang kanyang secret desire na maging matchmaker. Besides, she knew Andreau liked her roommate noong bagong lipat sila. It didn't help na ilang beses nang nabiktima ng Pascual Eye Fuck si Andreau kapag nagkakasabay nila ang lalaki sa elevator. So, she set them up on a movie date five months ago... na naging successful naman. Finalfuckingly, hindi na NBSB ang roommate niya.

But holy shit, the sex. She wasn't expecting that. She never imagined that. She didn't know Zade had it in her. Araw-araw na lang may kaganapan; either sa unit nila or kina Andreau. Wish she could say na exaggeration na narinig at naabutan niya ang sexy times ng dalawa sa iba't ibang oras ng araw. One time she caught them making out in the laundry room at 3:30 am. Gano'n ka-wild ang dalawa.

Good thing na may mini lounging area ang condominium unit nila every floor kaya ito ang ginagawa niyang evacuation center kapag inaatake ng kati ang dalawa. Sadly, she could still hear them getting it on from her safe spot in the lounging area. Malala talaga, considering na nasa dulo ng hallway ang mga unit nila.

Kesh heard a door slammed shut down the hallway, followed by a loud and angry "Putangina naman, Andreau! Wala pang 9:30 am! Mahiya naman kayo!". Pinigilan na lang ni Kesh ang tawa niya. Patay si Andreau nito mamaya.

Seconds later, a grumpy guy sat beside her on the sofa. Doon na bumigay ang tawa niya. Bihira na nga lang umuwi ang roommate ni Andreau na si Roldan dahil sa busy schedule nito as a pilot, tapos ganito pa ang maaabutan niya.

"Bilib din ako sa 'yo ha. Natagalan mo ng 15 minutes ang ingay nila," she says after Roldan calmed down a bit. "Lumabas na nga ako no'ng pumasok si Andreau sa room ni Zades. Inaantok pa nga ako leche."

Shrugging, Roldan mutters under his breath. "Like fucking rabbits. I swear. Tangina lang talaga. Araw-araw bang ganyan?"

"Yeah. Pretty much." Kesh laughsfor a full minute at his horrified reaction. "Buti nga wala ka rito eh. Pinakamalala na ata 'yong three weeks ago. Tanghaling tapat sa shower. I think they're trying out tantric sex or something. Tangina lang talaga. Feeling ko pwede na akong magsulat ng isang erotica book series thanks to them. Pero... I have to give it to Andreau. A+ ang dirty talking skills. Ang hot."

"Shit, stop it!" Roldan groans, covering his ears. "Tama na 'yong mga narinig ko kanina!"

"Oh by the way, double check your sofa bago ka humiga do'n ha. Watch out for come stains.

Kesh admits that she kind of relishes in the horrified expression he gets on his face. At least she's not alone in this. Plus, ang cute ni Roldan kapag namumutla.

"No shit? Doon ako nakahiga kanina! Tangina naman Andreau!" Panicking, Roldan almost removes his shirt in front of her. Good thing nagkape siya kanina at kahit paano nasa katinuan pa siya, at pinigilan niya ang paghuhubad ng lalaki.

"Hey chill ka lang! No need to remove your shirt jeez!"

"That's it," he says, raising his arms in surrender. "I need new friends."

"Same," she agrees.

"Sorry if I'm reacting like this, Kesh. Ang... weird lang kasi. Hindi ako sanay na..."

"Sexually active na yang kaibigan mo?"

He nods. "We've been friends since we're four years old and... shit. I know he's way far from being a prude but... I don't have to know ever explicit detail of his sex life. They're fucking like rabbits every single day? Nagtatrabaho pa ba sila?"

"Yeah. Kaso pag-uwi ni Zades si Andreau agad ang kasama niya." Kesh lets out a sad sigh. "Look, don't get me wrong. I'm very happy for them. Ako pa nga ang Cupid nilang dalawa, 'di ba? I love Zades and she's my best friend... but I miss her. Ayokong magpaka-clingy pero nakakamiss lang kasi 'yong dating kami. Hindi ko na kasi siya masyadong nakakausap lately. Agh ano ba 'to!" she laughs. "Why are we talking about feelings anyway? Ang aga pa para mag-emo!"

She expects to see a teasing smile on Roldan's face but no, he's smiling at her thoughtfully, as if saying he understands her. "It's alright," he says. "Ako rin naman eh. Lagi na nga akong wala tapos ganyan pa ang maabutan ko. Karma na siguro 'to sa 'kin. Years ago kasi parang ako rin si Andreau. Tangina, ganito pala ang feeling niya dati. Gumaganti ang gago."

"Ang gago nga niya kung gumaganti siya sa 'yo. Unbelievable."

"Tapos na kaya sila?"

Kesh glances at the hallway. "Maybe? Kaso may round two agad 'yon after 30 minutes."

"Wow, that fast."

"I-check mo nga kung may iniinom na aphrodisiac shit yang si Andreau ha? Or wag mo na siyang pakainin ng oysters or something."

"I will." He groans. "Fuck, kailangan ko na bang palitan 'yong couch namin? Favorite ko pa naman 'yon."

"Yeah, pero si Andreau na lang ang pagbayarin mo. Make sure to ask him in the middle of a blowjob or something para hindi siya makatanggi."

"That's..."

"What? Cruel? Annoying?"

"Brilliant, actually."

"Basta susuportahan kita dyan! Promise! Tulungan kitang hulihin 'yong dalawa. Madalas 'yon sa kitchen.

"Ikaw ba, may kailangan ka pa sa unit niyo?"

"Hmm... I could use a new mini fridge for my room para hindi ko na sila mahuli sa kitchen."

"Okay, noted. One new couch and one new mini fridge."

"You sure hindi magagalit si Andreau niyan?"

"Aba subukan lang niyang magalit. He fucking violated my favorite couch."  

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Don't worry, may second part pa 'to 😉