How I See You

Chapter 10 - It's Alyssa.

It’s Alyssa.

Will. Kissed. Me.

Oh my God.

I’d never even been kissed before!

I almost had a panic attack too. And then he kissed me again. And I kissed him back. It was such a new feeling to be held around the waist, and then his hands in my hair, and on my bare neck.

And I loved it.

And it was Will.

He was so . . . I don’t know. He was so close to me, his chest right against mine, his lips against mine, leaving me with the sensation of my lips being on fire.

I’m just stood in the passageway, touching my lips continuously.

But I can’t have any sort of relationship like this with him. Or am I thinking to deeply about this? Maybe this was just another one of those kiss and leave things he’s done.

I don’t know what to think! My heart is just thumping madly, my whole face burning. What is going to happen now? Is he going to announce some public relationship, or will this whole scene just stay a secret? Will he ignore me after this now that he’s got what he wanted? Or is he not thinking like that?

I like you, Alyssa. I like you a lot.

Did he actually mean that? I still feel weird and breathless as I walk back to my garden and then up to my room. My dad passes me on the stairs, and I just greet him absent-mindedly, rushing past him.

Once in my room, I sit down on my bed.

Oh my God.

What am I going to do?

I’ll just have to tell him.

Out straight – I cannot do this. Anything. My parents, Avril, Myra, Zara, his friends, Niall, Katy, and even I, would all freak out beyond comprehension. I don’t even know what to do in a relationship and I am so not ready for it.

Or maybe we’ll just act as if nothing happened? In a way, that would be easier. But . . . then that’d prove he was a jerk and just a guy who kisses and then leaves if he decided to ignore it.

And anyway, I’m not going to ignore this.

I have decided.

I’m going to just blurt out my feelings.

Then why am I not picking up the phone and ringing him now?

I’ll just wait until he’s finished tea, shall I?

Argh. Right.

I am not going to chicken out!
I pick up my sketch book and flick through the pages until I find Will’s picture. I look down at it. I would just die if he saw this and knew I had actually drawn him.

I stay in my room for the next twenty minutes, playing the piano and guitar. I need to calm down before I call him.

Seriously.

That’s when the bell rings.

I go race down the stairs, yelling, “I’ve got it!” and then tear the door open.

This is not calm.

Will is stood at the door, hands shoved in his pockets, hair the same unruly, perfect mess, eyes intense and calm.

He obviously doesn’t do kiss-and-leave anymore.

“Hey.” He smiles.

I sigh. “I need to talk to you.”
His gaze darkens. “About what?” He asks softly. Why is his voice so . . . hypnotizing?