Leah's POV
I was woken up by my incredibly noisy phone alarm, feeling really tired and the hangover from the night before was real. My whole body hurt specially my head. I brought myself to the bathroom not even opening my eyes and sat on the toilet. I finished there and washed my face, my teeth and looked for an aspirin. I needed coffee, the darkest one. I went downstairs and prepared some and poured some milk in a bowl adding some cereal. I finished eating that and drank my cup of coffee. It was almost 8:14 when I finished there and I went upstairs to take a shower and dress up to go to work. When I was ready to go I grabbed my phone and noticed the label of the alarm. "Psychologist"
"Shit!!!" I yelled with frustration. I was running super late. I had fifteen minutes to get there. I ran downstairs grabbed my things and literally, ran to my car. When I finally made it there I was five minutes late but I knew she wouldn't notice. She didn't stand up from her desk before I knocked on the door, that was her usual routine.
"Hey" I said to Jennifer's assistant, secretary, I don't know, the woman outside. "Good morning Ms. Remini, Doctor Lopez is ready to see you now" all fifty shades of grey and stuff. I grinned. "Thank you" I knocked at the door and then opened it without waiting for a reply. "Morning Doc" I said and walked to the usual spot, the couch. "Morning" she replied. She didn't look up and it gave me some time to check on her. She was wearing a tight red dress and her hair was in a ponytail. She was gorgeous. Her makeup was soft and she was focus on her laptop holding a Starbucks. Then she walked over and it all started.
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She just told me we were over, I mean, the session. She didn't even bother to mention anything about what happened in my car the other day, and neither did I. I didn't want to make the situation even more awkward, so I waited for the session to be over so I could bring that up. I didn't even know why I was bringing that up, but I wanted to know how she felt. She stood up walking over her desk and I walked behind her and placed both of my hand on her hips. Okay, there I was, about to do something I would totally regret, I knew that, but fuck it. "Wh-what are you doing?" She muttered. God, it was so hot knowing I made her feel vulnerable. It was like sand sliding through my fingers. She melted in a way I liked it, everytime I touched her, and I had my doubts about it but when I placed my hands on her again she did the exact same thing and I gotta be honest, it turned me on. The smallest things she did, were just, mesmerizing. She didn't do anything special, like, she did the same things other people did, but when she did it, it was special and I loved it. Her kisses...yeah because she kissed me back, not as I'd have wanted her to but she did. Her lips are so soft, and I was dying to taste them again. I pushed a little on her hips and she placed both of her hand on the desk. Shit. She turned over moving my hands away and leaning on her desk. Her face was hysterical. "What are you doing?" She asked again as I walked closer. She couldn't run away, she was trapped with my body. "I- I just really wanna kiss you right now" I whispered and she looked down at my lips and then my face. "I-im sorry but I can't" she said and moved her face away. "Why?" I asked softly looking at her as she was still looking away. "Fuck" she whispered really low and then faced me. "Because I can't kiss any of my patients and besides- I..." oh no, she was about to say she was straight and then she would say she had someone and I was about to get hurt. It was about to get awful for me. Oh no no no....So I didn't have many choices, I could kiss her right there, shut her up and the ran away, I could let her talk and get my feelings hurt, I could tell her I liked her...gosh. But- guess what did I choose?...Hmm, you right. I crashed my lips onto hers and placed my hand on her nape fixing her so the kiss would be great. She hesitated for a few seconds, and even tried to push me off, but I wouldn't let go. I would need a whole year of sessions for being a crazy psycho who didn't want to stop kissing her psychologist. She finally pulled away but I was still close to her face. She caught her breath and then looked at me, straight in my eyes. "Leah I-" "Please don't...Don't say anything, just- I don't wanna know" "But you need to know it" "No...please" I begged her. Whatever it was I didn't wanna know it. She sighed and bit her lip. "Shit, you make it so hard for me" I said and went to kiss her again. This time she didn't hesitate, she kissed me back. It felt so great, but it didn't last long enough. "I can't" she said and I rolled my eyes. I grabbed my purse and then walked to her again. "I'll see you on Friday" I said and pecked her lips as she moved her fingers to her now swelled from kissing, mouth, tracing over it. I literally ran away. I ran out to my car, with this big grin on my face. She was so great. Everything about her was perfect. She was perfect. I needed her badly, I just needed her, and I was willing to try everything in my power to have her.
I drove over the office and sat behind my desk checking papers. I couldn't focus, that kiss we shared was playing over and over inside my head. I wanted to do it again.
"Hey you" the girl I was screwing walked over to my desk. "Hey mama, how was your weekend?" "Shitty, not worth talking about it, yours?" "Same" I shrugged. "Are you going out for lunch with me?" She asked and I made a face. "I'm under observation, remember? We are not supposed to be hanging out and having a thing" "We don't have a thing, it's just two workers going out for lunch, anything else" she grinned and I shook my head, "Lunch it is" she bit her lip and leaned down, "But maybe we could have dessert...at the back of your car, I don't know...perhaps I'm in the mood for sweets" I knew she wasn't just up for lunch. I bit my lip and leaned back on my seat. "Perhaps" I replied and she started walking away. "See you"
-
As planned, after having lunch I almost had a thing at the back seat of my car. I almost die no joke, I was still processing that pizza we had and I was so full, but the girl was needy so... By four I was going back to my house. I was at a red light stop when I looked around and saw Jennifer inside her car, she was fixing her makeup and then fixed her boobs. Goddamn. I pulled the window down and honked and she jumped on her seat and then looked at me. She didn't know what to do. She smiled and then it changed green and she started going away. I had a thing, an idea, yeah a not so good one, I wanted to follow her. I was curious. She was clearly going to meet with someone. She was fixing herself in her car. I let her go far enough so she couldn't see me and I started following her. I was at the edge, I was creeping on her. Oh god. She pulled into someone's driveway and honked a few times. After a few seconds a man- one I knew- walked out getting in her car. It was the same one she was having dinner the other day with. So she was probably in a relationship with him, so that was probably what she wanted to tell me when I kissed her. I knew I would get my feelings hurt, so I stopped her, but I wasn't expecting this, and either way I got hurt. I shouldn't have because there was no reason, she was no one but my psychologist, and I was trying to get in her way, I kissed her twice already, I was just being reckless. Ugh, I hated me. Now what...she's in a relationship, so what? Would I continue to kiss her and stuff? That was over. She was with someone and I wouldn't get in her way...or maybe I would... At the exact moment I didn't want to know anything about it. I had a whole week to try and figure something out.
I drove back to my house and opened a bottle of red wine grabbing a glass and heading upstairs. I prepared a bath and got inside filling one glass. I sat there thinking about everything and now I had Jennifer to add up to my list...Soon enough the bottle was empty and I threw myself in bed. It was kind of impossible not to have a shitty day anymore. Happiness lasted like 3 seconds for me, it was usual, never failed.
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v o t e
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c o m m e n t.
