Jennifer's POV.
"The girl at the office?" I asked and she shook her head no. I was about to regret the next question I was about to ask, "Who is it?" She looked away not really sure about what she wanted to say. "You" fuck. I didn't panic because I knew she would say that, I had no idea why but I knew it. "Me? What are you saying? This has nothing to do with me- Leah you came here not knowing me, I have nothing to do with your problems" "You made them worse" she said and I raised both of my eyebrows. "Excuse me?" "I swear Jennifer all I think about is you- I can't fucking take you out of my head. I try, but I can't, and I find myself looking for that girl to just try and not think about you. I swear I was about to leave her because it's easy for me like, I don't need anything or anyone, but I feel like I need you" "This is not right, I'm not a friend, I'm your psychologist" I assured her, "Don't confuse kindness doctor- patient kindness, to a flirty kind of one." I said and she pressed her lips together. "Tell me you didn't feel something when we kissed..." this wasn't going to end up good. "Leah-" "You're dating that guy, don't you?" "No!" I said immediately and then I thought I could've used him as an excuse, but it was too late. "He's a friend" I said and she looked at me with hopes up, I knew that face. "You're not gay...is that what it is?" I was about to reply but I stopped myself. "Leah stop. You're just needy" "No, you don't get it...I'm telling you how I fucking feel about this and you're just- forget it. I'll get going and I'll see on Monday" shit. "Leah wait" I followed her and grabbed her by her arm making her turn over. "What!?" We started at each other's faces for a second and then she moved her hand to my face and brought herself close and kissed me. I hesitated for some seconds and then pushed her against the door kissing her back. After a minute I stopped but I let my forehead against hers and my eyes were still closed. "I can't do this" I whispered and bit my lip. "Please..." she whispered and moved her hand to grab my face and tried kissing me again but I pulled away completely. "I'm sorry I can't, I'll have to ask you to leave" she sighed and clenched her jaw. "I was about to leave before you stopped me, I'll see you on Monday." She said and exited my office shouting the door.
Well, and the award to who hurt more people in such a short period of time goes to...
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"Go out with me please" I said talking over the phone with my friend Lucy. We went to college together and she's the only one I didn't screw back then. Yay me. "Well hello there!" "Yeah yeah but I need you to go out with me. I have too many things in my head." "I'm not giving free sessions" she joked. "Dinner. I'll pay" "Deal. You still live in the same place?" "Yes!" "Alright, I'll go pick you up then, get ready, I'll be there in twenty" she said and hung up. I was ready. I just fixed my makeup and that was it. I had a white tight dress on and my hair was up. Nineteen minutes later she was there.
I got inside and she smiled at me. "You're so sexy. Fuck." "Are you hitting on me? Because I have a husband" she said, obviously kidding, she did have a husband though. "A quickie doesn't count as cheating" I joked and she laughed, "it does, sure as hell."
Lucy was the typical woman who had her shit together and you had no idea how...Everything came out perfect for her, her relationships, her life in general, it was perfect. Everything came out nicely done. She was smart as fuck and beautiful, like you had no idea. She looked like Snow White. She was pale but a cute type of, her cheeks were rosy and her hair was long straight and black. She had dark chocolate eyes and the sweetest smile. She was also naturally blessed with a ridiculously perfect body.
"How are you, baby?" She asked and started driving. "I'm alright, you?" "I'm amazing" "Did your wedding ring get bigger or it's just me?" she laughed, "It's always been this big, and shiny" she showed off for a second and I laughed a little, "I've always loved that ring. It's gorgeous" she nodded and then stopped the car looking at me. "Why did you stop?" She looked at me with a grin on her face, "Because the light is red, maybe?" I laughed, "Right" "Tell me...what did you want to talk about?" "So...I may or may not be having feelings towards a patient" I said and bit my nail. Her eyes widen. "Oh" the light changed and she started driving again. "What's the problem with it?" "Well the fact that she's my patient would be a good start" "But I don't know I'm worried it may be-" "Do you really think this is just her getting attached because you make her feel understood?" I nodded. She knew what I was talking about. It sometimes happen and you can't control it. "So how would I know that? I mean..." "But your feelings are true...Aren't they?" "I think so yeah. I've kissed her like three times, I just don't feel like this is the right thing to do. This is totally against the rules" "What rules?" She frowned. "She's my patient!!!" "So? It's not like you work for someone. You're your own boss, you can do whatever you want, you make your own rules." She said, I sighed. That wasn't much help, I was expecting her to advice me to stop doing what I was doing and of course what I was feeling.
"But of course you're doubting it...Commitment is your worst fear" she said and I rubbed my forehead. "I don't even know when I got myself into this" "It just happens. Give it a shot maybe?" "No! Lu, oh my god, I thought you were going to make me stop" "Sadly I cannot stop you from feeling some ways. Does she know you're gay?" "Not really. I thought if I told her that'd make her think I was available somehow" "True. Smart move" "That wasn't a move. I wanted to make one but I knew that wasn't going to be a smart one" I explained.
She parked the car and we got inside the Chinese restaurant, we sat down and continued talking.
"What should I do? I need an actual solution because I was trying to avoid this but it's happening, I can't anymore, and it's only been weeks..." "Give it a shot" "That's not a solution" "It certainly is..." "She's fucked up" "Jen...your worst fear is commitment, why would you point her out?" "Shit" she was right, she always knew what to say, but today I wasn't happy with the answers, because they were true. "I can't give it a shot, because she's my patient" "Stop saying that, I get it, but that doesn't erase the fact that you like her- do you have any idea if she may like you back?" "Yeah she told me she did" "Oh there you have it...then what are you waiting for?" "She's-" "No! Do not say it...outside the office she's not. Is she a permanent one?" I shook my head. "See? That's it, wait until it's over and give it a damn shot" She finally said and I made a face. "Sooner or later you're going to have to stop the stupidity of the commitment shit. It's not that bad I promise...when it's the right person, it's wonderful" "How the fuck will I know?" "You just do." She nodded and we ordered our food and spent the time there talking, we eventually changed the subject and started talking about marriage and work, and all that.
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"Try it" she said holding my hand, "Talk with her, outside the office" "She's fucked up, Lucy I don't know" "Every crazy person needs their own personal psychologist" she winked, "I can assure you that" she added and it made me smile. "You're crazy" "I'm honest. Maybe all she needs is someone to make her feel good, maybe she just needs someone" she said and it made think a lot of things. When she yelled she felt lonely. My heart broke. I sighed. "Keep me updated okay? Try something, just try- but of course if you feel like it. Don't push it" she said and then gave me this sweet smile. "I love you, Lu" "I know you do" she smiled and I laughed a little. "I love you too. You should call more often" "I will do. Thank you for tonight" "Anytime, thank you for dinner! Have a good night." "Thanks, same to you, tell George I say hi" "I will do" she smiled and I got out of the car, I waved at her as she was leaving and then got inside my house. After walking Beau I went upstairs and took a shower. When I looked for my phone I had a text. I opened it and realized it was Dana.
"Can I come over?"
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