It isn't about dreams,
It isn't about the way everything seems to be crashing down around you,
it isn't about what you plan to do about it,
it isn't even about how you got to this place.
It's about the time it takes
to get to this moment,
and the time it takes to move forward.
Your dreams or rebuilding,
honing skills that you never knew,
It means nothing without you.
And that time, it's precious.
Be jealous of it.
Because you are never getting it back.
So stand up and act like someone
who wants to live.
And I don't mean live,
I mean LIVE.
Live like you can't afford to die.
Breath life into that word
and let me see it in your eyes.
Be someone who wears their life
with some pride,
despite the regret the resides in you;
and above all don't waste time.
You'll blink and it will be gone,
Only the songs of the past will be left
and soon you'll forget how to sing them,
and everyone who knew you
will forget them too.
People spend so much life on things
not worth living for.
I'm terrified of waking up one day
and seeing all of my life behind me
and regretting not enjoying more sunsets
or speaking to more people,
I live in this constant fear of
not seeing enough, not doing enough,
of not being who I want to be.
And the funny thing is,
people tell me I'm still young,
that I have time, while in the same breath weeping about how theirs has flown by.
Can't they see that I want to
make the most of it?
Already I have bags under my eyes from the copious amounts of learning I attempt.
Because being young does not make me exempt from experiencing life.
If anything it compels me to take everything in, and fill my mind with things
I could never even dream of.
And yet it can become an obsession.
The driving need grounded in the deep fear that I will never see it all,
there will never be enough time on the wall for me to learn everything.
It takes a lot for me to accept that,
not because I yearn to be omniscient,
but because I feel like so much time has already been spent
and I've gotten no where.
I have to keep coming back to the fact that it's not about the dreams or
the all the things I wish to learn,
it's just about the process of what I do with what I learn, and how I grow and live and yearn... maybe it is about the dreams, or at least, what I believe.
SK
