Sometimes I wonder if I'll ever find it.
You know, that they that they all have.
The thing that makes them all look so happy,
the thing that makes them talk about hope
like it's something reachable.
I have this really bad habit of being unteachable until I'm in the worst trouble
and now I wish I had just paid more attention, maybe if I had listened I wouldn't be looking
for this thing now.
I would have had it somehow.
I know I'm not unfixable,
I haven't fallen that far,
and I know that life's worth living,
I haven't given it all up,
but I just want the thing that helps me get there.
You know, the thing that they all have
that makes them say things like,
"Oh we all have problems. None of us are perfect" with such unhurried strain,
this is their unburdened refrain
and I sometimes envy them for saying that
with such lightness of heart.
I only say that line in jest,
because if I said it and meant it
I'd have to admit that I am
the first person on my own list
to whom that phrase relates.
I would have to admit that to everyone,
and so you can see what lies at the heart
of my imperfections.
But when I do find that thing,
whatever it is, I'll let you know.
Perhaps after that I'll stop writing poems.
SK
A/N: Don't take that last line too seriously.
