Forever and Always // Ashton Irwin (#Wattys2017)

6 - Words Left Unsaid

Perfect - Hedley
When you're caught in a lie and you've got nothing to hide
When you've got nowhere to run and you've got nothing inside
It tears right through me, you thought that you knew me
You thought that you knew

**THERE IS A SECTION IN THIS CHAPTER THAT BROUGHT UP SOMETHING THAT WAS IN CHAPTER 38 OF SID. I TRIED TO RE-EXPLAIN IT BUT IF YOU'RE STILL CONFUSED WHEN YOU'RE DONE READING THIS GO CHECK OUT THAT CHAPTER :-)**

A S H T O N

My eyes scanned over my fiancé's face. She had dark blue bags underneath her eyes that showcased her lack of sleep. Her hair was disheveled, and she looked as if she was rapidly losing weight. My eyes wandered to the sandwich in front of her that had two measly bites taken out of it.

Her hands were flailing about as she talked. Her over-animation was something she would do to try and compensate for her lack of liveliness.

My heart hurt as I watched her.

Something was wrong, something deeper than I could understand.

I wasn't fully convinced when she told me that she used to get nightmares all the time after her brother and best friend died.

Especially this morning at two, she woke up crying in my arms.

My own arms.

I couldn't even protect her from this darkness that was taking over her life. How was I supposed to stand up in front of our friends and family in three weeks and promise her that I'd be with her for better or for worse? How could I tell her that I would always protect her when all she did was cry harder as I hugged her and tried to comfort her?

She was pushing me farther and farther away and my heart ached for her to be close with me again.

"Ashton, are you even listening to me?" She asked as she waved her hand in front of my face. I snapped out of my thoughts and nodded as I took a sip of my water.

"Then what did I just say?" She questioned as she raised her eyebrows.

"Something about the wedding?" I smiled at her because I had no clue what she said. In all honesty, I hoped she wouldn't be mad that I zoned out.

"It was about the rehearsal dinner but whatever." She rolled her eyes as she took a sip of her lavender iced tea.

"I'm sorry."

"No big deal, it wasn't important anyways." She sighed as she placed her hands in her lap. She'd been short with me the past couple of days. She had genuinely started to act like I didn't care about anything anymore, when that definitely wasn't the case.

I cared so much it hurt.

I reached across the table and placed my palm up, hoping she would place her small hand in mine.

"It is a big deal Jordyn."

She looked up at me with tired eyes.

"Are you ready to go now?" She asked as she slid her purse strap over her shoulder, leaving my hand empty.

She stood up from where she was sitting and stared at me.

"Ashton. Let's go." Before I could say anything she had walked away from our table and pushed the door to the restaurant open. Her hands were shoved deep into her pockets as she walked by the window.

My mouth was slightly agape at the exchange that had just happened. It didn't register in my mind until she was halfway past the restaurant outside. I shot out of my seat and pushed open the door to the restaurant.