Crash (SC, #0.5; ARTL, #1)

Chapter 16

Chapter 16

Truth

I woke up when sun rays pressed against my cold skin. I was blinking rapidly, processing where I was. Tumitig ako sa ceiling hanggang sa maalala ang lahat ng nangyari kagabi. A bile forming in my throat and my hands started to wander inside the comforter. I am stark naked...fuck. It is really.

Kaagad akong napaupo upang tignan mabuti ang paligid. Harry isn't around. Ako lamang ang tao sa loob ng kanyang kwarto. Nakapirme sa isang upuan ang aking damit saka ang aking undergarments. Napalunok ako ngunit hindi ako nagpatalo sa kaba. I really did kiss him secretly last night. He kissed me without knowing who was I last night. He was drunk and so was I. We did it. We really did it.

Oh...my god.

Damn it!

Binilisan ko ang pagsusuot sa aking damit. I smelled shit, but I don't care. Sinuklay ko na lamang ang gulong-gulo kong buhok gamit ang aking kamay. Pagkatapos ay nagmamadali akong lumabas ng kanyang kwarto.

And so, he's here in his small sala, thinking deeply.

Napalunok ako nang makita ang seryoso niyang mukha habang nakatingin lamang sa bintana. Napahilamos siya gamit ang kanyang kamay pagkatapos ay marahas na tinanggal ang unang butones ng kanyang polo.

"Harry..." ang aking tinig ay hindi ko maintindihan.

Mabilis na lumipad ang kanyang tingin sa akin. Nagmamadali akong lumapit sa kanyang pwesto ngunit sabay alis naman niya ng pagkakaupo. He was giving us space--distant. Hindi siya makatingin sa akin ng diretso bagkus sa lapag lamang nakadikit ang kanyang tingin.

"Harry..." I uttered, quivering lips.

Hindi ko makuhangang makahinga ng maayos sa nakikita ko sa kanya. Why it looked like everything is a mistake he never wanted to commit for his life? Mukha ba 'kong maling-mali? Am I dirty now? Ganoon na ba 'yon? I can't believe this...what the fuck, really!

"Nathalie, I'm sorry..." panimula niya sabay titig sa akin. He raked his hair by his hand then rubbed the both forcefully, collecting his thoughts. "I'm so, sorry. It should be. This shouldn't happened--"

I stopped.

"What?" Humugot ako ng malalim na hininga. "I love you, Harry! It's fine! It's fine for me! It should be fine with you because it is okay to me! Okay lang!" Halos bawat salita'y pasigaw ko ng minutawi sa sobrang emosyong nararamdaman ng aking sistema. My blood is freaking boiling with so much emotions I can't even recognize. "Right, it should be okay?" I stepped forward but he statue. Humakbang muli ako ngunit napaatras na siya ngayon. "What is wrong with that if I love you this much?" Tinuro ko ang aking puso.

But his eyes narrowed towards me.

My heart halted for a moment.

"Nathalie, I can't believe that you're still not giving up on lying to me?" He breathed, deeply. His jaw clenched. "Would you expect me to believe all the lies coming from your lips? I wanted to consider everything you'll say, but you can't even say the tiniest truth I wanted to know." He shook his head. "This couldn't happened. Sana'y hindi 'to nangyari!" Napaawang ako ng bibig. "Because I don't know what's the truth anymore from your words! You mean all to me...but what happened to you..." Para akong binuhasan ng malamig na tubig sa buo kong katawan. I can't even move. "I have girlfriend now...Nathalie." Padabog niyang tinaas ang kamay. "You have a boyfriend. And this is not fine, Nathalie! This is cheating!" My heart beating wildly against my ribcage. Tears pricked my eyes and my chin quaked. Tumulo ang mga luhang kanina papigil na pigil na lumabas.