A book of thoughts.

The biggest lie I ever told

     The biggest lie I ever told was that I loved you. Or well that I continued to tell you I loved you. I can't remember the last time I ever felt a sensation of 'love' towards you. 

     I'm sorry but I just don't love you. I avoided looking into your eyes every time I had to say it. I swallowed my pride and said it. Not meaning a word of what was coming out of my mouth.

     How could I ever love someone like you? Look at you. You put yourself before literally everyone, even those you're glued to at the hip. You don't defend anyone. You let people get ridiculed and put down and won't even bat an eye. 

     You have looked me in the eye while tears were streaming down my face as I was yelling at you, begging you to help me. What did you do? You stared at me stone faced and watched me drown. I think that was the day I lost respect for you. The day I realized I couldn't love a monster like you.