The Advice Column I

Thirty-Eight

Advice Request
This person feels that her husband isn't romantic enough and has had enough of being the first to show affection.

Answered Submission
Hello! This is something different but I'm totally ready for this challenge. So he has a job and he supports you, pretty much all the basic things that a husband usually does in this society, but he isn't acting like the husband you want? Let me begin with something all couples tend to underestimate the power of: communication. You may not see each other everyday because of the job he has but within the small period of time you have him to yourself, let him know how you feel. I know you may think that he should automatically know how you feel but believe it or not, he probably has no clue that he's making you feel this way. It's probably not easy for both of you to talk to each other about romantic things but let him know what you want or at least hint at it. I completely understand feeling a little embarrassed for wanting to do sweet things with your partner but I mean, you married the man. You both married each other and he's the love of your life. Let that fun, carefee energy fill your time. Don't be the adults you have to be.

Don't forget that this is your life too. You need to voice it to him what you want out of this marriage. If he gets comfortable and lazy, that doesn't result in a very good future for you. Tell him that you aren't satisfied with his actions and he needs to act more like a gentleman. I think just talking and arguing how you feel and hearing his response should show you the type of man he is. It should also foreshadow the rest of your lives, so if you don't like it now, do you think you will like it when you have kids together and grew into a family where you see each other constantly?

The future and the present come to account when it's about a relationship. If you don't like the present, you have to change it for a better future and if you can't do that, don't torture yourself being with someone you don't want to be with. Not every guy got the chance to learn how to act or what to say around his wife/girlfriend when they were younger so you need to teach him and tell him what makes you happy. I'm rambling now, but I hope I helped.

Create a happy marriage for a happy future. :)

The Advice Column Team