Liz Whats Wrong With You?

Embrace Myself

"Jack, pickle spears. Do you not know English?" I fussed and ran a frustrated hand through my hair as I paced about my bedroom anxiously. Six months with a child in you and suddenly you've learned how to work an attitude into every conversation. I heard the sound of jars clanking together then a sigh. "Hand Alex the phone."

"Yes mother." Jack sassed back and I bit my tongue. What a pain. I waddled out of my bedroom and down the stairs to the kitchen when I finally heard the phone being moved.

"Jack forget the ice cream brand again?" Alex chuckled. He had been taking this whole pregnancy thing so well lately. Crazy because usually the guy breaks after the fourth month and both parents become stressed. But stress is never good and that's kind of what Alex has been telling me.

"No. He doesn't know what type of pickles to get." I responded childishly and Rian laughed from the table. I steadied the phone between my cheek and shoulder, pouring coffee into a small cup. A feminine hand reached over me, snatching it away. I turned to face Hunter as she added sugar. Darcy ran up to her, latching to her leg as Zach came in with Braylee thrown over his shoulder, giggling. He smiled.

"I'm gonna get you munchkin, he grumbled in a playful monster voice, setting Braylee down. They both took off and Rian jumped up, running out behind Zach, chuckling.

"Alright kids. Be careful." Huner yelled, setting her cup down and shaking her head slightly. "They never learn."

"That was mine. I kind of need it since I've been up twenty four hours and these idiots don't know what pickle spears are." I huffed and leaned back against the counter, grabbing the phone again.

"You don't need it with a baby. Just think. Two more months and she'll be here." Hunter replied excitedly.

"I'll see you when I get home. Love you" Alex chirped and I groaned as the baby kicked my stomach. Weirdest feeling in the world. 

"Love you too babe. Bye."

I turned toward the sink and dropped my phone on the counter before turning the water on. I began washing dishes when Hunter squeezed herself between the sink and myself while scrubbing at a plate.

"Fine. I'm to tired for this. I'm laying down." I replied and started back up the stairs. I was ready for Isabelle to be here. Thinking about her was a constant thing for me. It seemed different when you hold another persons child, rather than yours. You look down into these wondering eyes, full of exploration and the hunger to know more. Then you think to yourself, could I make something as unique and delicate as this? And of course at that moment you'd answer yourself with a definite yes, because it seems easy for you to tell yourself that.

It really isn't though. You have to plan out their life for years, buy things to take care of their needs, think every action out before you physically do it. Would eating this harm him/her? Should I be in this room while they smoke? Everything becomes a question built around this innocent child. 

I stopped by Izzy's room, taking a second to overlook its contents. Her circular cream colored crib sat in the center of the room, a light peach canopy hanging over head as flowers and fake mushrooms decorated around it. I leaned over the railing, carefully picking the powder pink bunny up off the mattress. Its limbs hung sulkily from its ragged torso. I smiled sadly, cradling the plush toy to my chest.

"My mom bought me this my first Easter Izzy and when you get here she'll be yours too." I hummed quietly, letting my eyes wonder around the walls. On the opposite side, Isabelle was placed in black cursive across the creme wall, shelves lining themselves below, packed full of outfits and other goodies we'd been given or bought. I was content with the name we had chosen.

Isabelle Dimitri  Gaskarth. A name me and Alex, surprisingly, chose together. We both thought it was very beautiful and Izzy had always been a name I kept in mind when it came to kids. I can only pray she has her mothers crystal eyes and her dads sandy hair.

I took a seat in the rocking chair across the room, rubbing at the velvet ears of the rabbit in my hand. I took my free hand and laid it over my bump, rubbing my thumb slightly over it in a motherly way.

"I hope you're proud of me mom. There's never a day that I don't miss you. I've changed a lot you know. Got married to the man of my dreams, ended up pregnant, but I'm stronger now." I whispered, holding tears back as I swallowed the lump in my throat. "And dad, I'm still your little princess. No matter how much I change. I love you both. Don't ever forget that. I'm just grateful that I got the chance to learn enough from you both. To grow up with you  teaching me. Not destroying my personality. That's the one thing I can say you both did. Taught me to embrace myself and never hide my personality. Thank you." 

My eyes had fluttered shut as I rocked back and forth, using my foot to push myself. Izzy moved again and I laughed lightly. Busy little baby. I can only imagine how hyper she'll be at three.

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First my lovely ducklings, there is a picture to the side of the crib and part of the room. Secondly, Two or three more chapters and Liz will be finished. NOOOOO! I know right ;D I gotcha guys. There IS going to be a sequel. However, I need ideas for the title. Love to hear yours. Anyways I love you guys. Thanks for the support. ~ Taylor