Ronnie's Songs (Completed) #Wattys2017

XI - Still Falling

I'm still learning, still burning, still falling...

It's been three days since I found out that Alice was Kate's best friend. It's also been three days since I've last seen Tom's face, and that was even in a video chat. He's studying in another university that's thirty minutes away and--wait... why do I even care?

It's been three days since he decided to go M.I.A. He's probably busy with all the girls surrounding him.

If that is what he wants then I'm not getting into his way. Pfft.

Chris wasn't helping either, because I told him what I knew and he said to me in all bitterness, "I've heard of an Alice before. Ka--she used to tell me stories about that girl. I still don't care." After that he neither answered my texts nor my calls. He was in his cave again.

Of all the people that Kate could be best friends with, it just had to be Alice.

Great.

It makes me wonder sometimes how small and complicated the world is. How we all have probably walked past a stranger who would've soon unknowingly become an important part of our lives... Perhaps we've bent down to tie our shoelaces and missed Mr. Right strutting in front of us, or it could be that we turned our heads to the wrong direction when the one passed by. It can also be that that one student in our school that we've never talked to nor acquainted with, would soon be a very important person to us.

We can never can tell.

I remember when I was in sixth form, Luke and I had those one-second eye contact, those eye contacts that we usually give to strangers, whenever we'd walk past each other along the school corridors or during class. We hadn't known each other back then but he's already made a tiny impact in my life because of that, no matter how unnoticed it was.

I may not have known nor remembered him at that time, even with those one-second glances that seemed so random, but now I realise how stupid I was for ignoring all the signs that lead to the present.

Those insignificant eye contacts happened because we were meant to know each other in the future, and I never ever thought that was likely to happen before. He was very reserved whereas I never really cared about him in the past. All I knew was that I had this stupid little crush on him that didn't even escalate that much,
although it's starting to resurface again.

Why am I suddenly talking about him?

All right. I'm stalking him on Facebook right now and it made me think all these things, how we never really knew each other but now... fate slipped into our lives and lingered.

Until when?

I can only guess.

Question number one: Why am I stalking him?

Oh dear, he's been giving me all these cryptic signs that he's into me and I don't know whether to believe him or not because he acts different to me in person. So I'm stalking him on Facebook to know more about him. Completely stupid but... sometimes it helps.

The other day--after that night when he told me I was pretty--we saw each other when I went to Chris' practice after class and he didn't even show any recognition of me. I was supposed to greet him but I chickened out when he ignored me as he threw a bottle of water to Chris then immediately went back to the pitch. It was like I was invisible to him. I felt my self-esteem go deeper than hell.