Oikawa X Reader

8.

I run a hand through my messy hair as I lean over the stove. My eyes are still half-lidded from my sleep, but a certain toddler demanded dinner. I mindlessly stir vegetables in the pan, as I listen to the sound of voices from the other side of the thin kitchen wall.

I can't make anything out other than Seiji's giggles, which make me smile. Suddenly, an arm wraps around my waist, and a head rests in the crook of my neck. I let the head rest there for a moment, before turning around, causing the tall brunette to unwind his arms from around my middle.

"This is moving way too fast," I chuckle, turning off the stove, "It's not that I don't... like the direction things are moving in, but we need to figure things out first Tooru."

"Well (F/N)-chan I tried to figure things out earlier, but you insisted on taking a nap," he smirks, "Cuddling up to you was nice though."

"Tooru, focus." I smile, softly punching his arm.

"Fine, fine," he exhales, tracing a hand along mine, his fingers feeling the every outline of my fingers. I can feel the pads of his fingertips encircle my knuckles, almost as if he's attempting to memorize their every bump, "We'll talk when he goes to bed?"

I look in his eyes, the suggestive tone of his voice is endearing, and I would take him up on the offer if I wasn't still feeling so apprehensive about rebuilding our relationship. I have to admit, he hasn't lost any of his womanizing abilities, which is part of what worries me so much...

"Dinners ready," I tell him, "Can you get Seiji?"

"Of course." He smiles, pulling his hand away from mine.

His presence lingers even after he leaves, and I can still feel his fingers over mine. I shake my head to bring me back to reality, as I begin making plates of food for each of us.

•••

"Goodnight Mommy!" Seiji chuckles, as I lean down for him to kiss my cheek. The small gesture, which has quickly become routine, marks the end of the night for the toddler, who now is running towards Tooru.

"Goodnight Oikawa-sama!" He shouts, motioning to be picked up. The older of the two obliges, lifting the toddler into his arms. Seiji pecks his cheek cutely, as my chest tightens.

As the toddler is set back on the ground, he runs off to the hallways leading to our bedrooms. I watch as he skips over his own, heading straight to mine, without thinking twice about it.

I shake my head, letting out a breathy laugh, and walk to the living room, lowering myself down onto the soft couch. Tooru follows me, sitting on the opposite side of the couch, staring at me. His eyes lap over my body, first searching my face, then moving downwards.

I clear my throats as he realizes what he was doing, and turns his gaze back to my face.

"So," I begin, though I have no clue where to start.

"So."

"You're the one who said you wanted to talk," I blush, flustered by my lack of words.

"Right," he exhales unevenly. His gaze falls, and for a moment I see a different side of him, one that rarely comes out. He seems vulnerable, nervous almost. It's drastically different from his childish sarcasm. It throws me off slightly, because I'm without a clue of what he's going to suggest.

"(F/N), I know I've only been back in your life for a little while, but there's so much I want to do already. I missed out on so much, and I don't want to miss anything else. I guess... I want to tell Seiji."

I nod, as the same tightening of my chest ensues. It feels like the worlds finally crashing down on me, like I don't have the protection of some fantasy world. I can no longer pretend everything will work out on its own, I'll have to make it work.

So many things run through my mind, I've already told him no once before, is it even fair to do it again? I can tell he's not planning on running again, or at least I hope not...

"I... I don't know."

"What do you mean?" He asks softly, reaching out for my hand.

I pull away from the comfort he would provide, instead running a hand through my hair, "I don't know, I just..." I exhale, curling my knees beneath me as I wring my hands together.

"(F/N), you can think about it don't worry," he smiles, though I can see the hurt in his eyes, "I'll wait if I have to."

"I'm not ready..." I mumble, my throat tightening.

"Not ready for what?" He asks, his voice soft and relaxing.

"I'm not ready to share him," I gulp, tears brimming my eyes, "I've had to do so many things by myself, I've had to do so much just to get us here. To bring someone else in-"

"You wouldn't have had to do it by yourself if you'd just called me." He cuts me off.

I stare at him blankly for a moment before words start falling out of my mouth, "You shouldn't have run off without me."

He looks at me for a moment before responding, his voice raising as he does so, "How many times do I have to apologize for that?"

"I'm sorry-" I begin quietly.

"I just want us to be together, what's so wrong with that?" He demands, grabbing my hand.

I tug my hand away looking at him coldly, "Tooru please be quiet..."

"I'm sorry," he sighs, bringing his voice back down to a whisper, "It's just hard."

"I think you should leave." I say, more to myself than him. I don't meet his glance, I don't want to know the mix of hurt emotions playing out on his face.

I feel his weight lift from the couch and soon after, the front door closes. I sit on the couch, mindlessly running my hand along the cotton fabric, before slowly standing up.

I make my way to the kitchen, staring at the vase of flowers on the counter. After only two days they've begun to droop, an unusually fast development. I grasp the vase and turn to the sink to pour out the water.

Suddenly, my feet trip over a stray toy of Seiji's, as the vase topples onto the ground. The glass, which scatters across the kitchen floor, manages to cut its way into the soles of my feet.

I topple to the ground as pain explodes in my extremities, blood beginning to cover the floor. Glass cuts into my legs which I've fallen onto, and my hands which I futilely used to brace my fall.

I cry out in pain, as I attempt to reach my cell phone on the corner of the counter.

"Mommy?" A voice asks shakily from the edge of the kitchen.

"Stay over there Seiji, it's not safe." I manage to say in a pained voice, "Mommy's okay."

I finally grab my phone by pushing myself forewords using my hands. I wince from the glass which cuts deeper into my palms, but open my phone, dialing the first number in my recents.

"Tooru, I need you."

A/N: The whole glass thing is based on something that actually happened to me, it was awful 😭