My Jan Valentine

Big gulps

I'm out grocery shopping with Jan today. I'm letting him put food in the cart because he picks good things. He does overload on meat products though but I don't mind, as long as it's eaten and not wasted and usually it's not wasted. Jan hardly wastes anything in the house. When he sees or smells something going old he eats it right away. Jan also really likes pop, he buys like 20 packages of bottled pop every week. We go to the cash register and I pay for the food. As we are leaving the store jan already has a pop in his hand and he's drinking it. "You can't wait till we get home?" I say while getting in the car.
I park the car on the side of the road in front of my house and then we get out. I notice a few teenage boys walking our way and quickly. I grab Jan's arm and try to get to the house but the boys bump into Jan and I, hard. "Look at this we got ourselves a feast tonight boys!" One of the teenage boys yell to his friends. They all pull out small pocket knifes and point them at us. Jan opens his bottle of pop and chugs it down. He throws the empty pop bottle at the group of boys and then grabs one by the neck. All the boys run towards us with there knifes. Jan pushes me out the way while he takes all of there stabs. "Fuck that stings." Jan says while looking each boy in the eye. The boys are now quivering in fear. "What the hell are you!" The one boy screams while continuously stabbing Jan in the chest. One of the boys begins to scream and run towards me. I try to crawl away but I don't think I will make it in time, I freeze and close my eyes, but I do not feel the impact I'm expecting instead I feel a warm body pressed up against mine. I open my eyes and Jan's back is pressed up against me and he's protecting me again. I see Jan's hands clench into a fist, he's upset now. I whisper to Jan in a low voice. "Please don't kill them." Jan's back tenses and then he sighs, turns around, kisses me, and then pokes me in the neck and I pass out.
When I wake up I am laying in my bed, the scent of blood strong. I go into the bathroom and see that there is blood everywhere and jan is trying to wash it off. I put my hands to my face and begin to cry. My legs become weak and I fall on my knees. I notice a lump in the blood. I clear the tears from my eyes and begin to reach towards it. I look up at Jan who noticed my existence in this room, he grabs my hand and pulls me up to his naked body. "Trust me you don't want to know what that is." He says with a playful but violent voice. He starts to undress me but I push away. "I'm fine." Is all I can say. I see he looks annoyed, and so I begin to slowly take my clothes off. When I am naked I push past Jan and get into the shower, I feel so cold and empty inside. I'm with a murder, I willingly do everything he wants me to do! My eyes begin to blur and suddenly I'm trembling. I see Jan is staring at me his face expressionless. He stares at me for a good 10 seconds before walking towards me. He goes to touch me but I move away. "Why the fuck aren't you letting me touch you?!" He says with annoyance. I grab him by the hair and pull his face close to mine. Our lips crash. Jan seems to be surprised, he pulls away to say something "I have never been this surprised in my life." He says while stepping into the shower. He's about to speak again but I quickly slide up close to his face. "Shh... Jan don't talk, just love me." I say and for a moment after I swear I heard Jan's heart thump. He grabs me by my hips and pulls me up to his waist. The sound of our wet bodies hitting against each other fills the bathroom. My eyes meet his wild golden eyes and I feel almost as if I'm trapped in a daze. I pull his hair away from his eyes and I continue looking into his eyes. He presses my back up against the cold shower wall and I gasp. I feel as though he is not himself, that's why his eyes are so wild and thats why he's being so rough. "Jan, w-what's the matter?" I ask. He doesn't say anything or look at me, he only continues to kiss my neck and chest. "Jan. Answer me right now!" I say with demand in my voice. He looks up at me, his eyes now dull. "I don't know how long we can stay together. I am a fucking magnet to danger! And I put your fucking hopeless human ass in danger! I usually don't give a shit who's life is about to be wasted but shit you've got me under your thumb. What if I ain't there to..." I stop him mid sentence. "Jan I don't care. I don't care what happens to me! I just want to be with you! I want you to lay in my bed beside me! I want to wake up every morning and make you breakfast! I want you to constantly make love to me! I want to see your face! Your eyes. Your noes... your lips. I want you." I collapse onto the the shower floor and I hold onto Jan's leg. I look up at him with determination and compassion in my eyes. "So... So don't leave me! Other wise when your gone... I will get into trouble. I'll sell my body to a group of old men!" I say, my breath heated and strong. Jan's pupils are now constricted and yellow as ever, I have no idea what this expression means but it kind of scares me. I quickly look away and my body quivers. He crouches down in front of me, grabs my chin and looks me straight in the eye. "Don't ever say something like that again. You'll make me angry and I'll do something reckless." His voice is haunting but I'm not ready to give up. I stand up and get out of the shower. He follows after me. When I'm about to turn the knob on the door I turn around and slap Jan hard across the face. I can't control my tears any longer. My hand burns from the impact. I quickly grab the door handle and leave. I need to convince Jan in any way possible.
I grab a vase and I throw it agains the wall. Then I flip a table and throw the bed sheets. Jan walks out and watches me do all of this, and when I'm about to punch the window he gets to me fast and pulls me into an embrace. "What have you done to me..." is all he says before taking me to the bed. He holds me in his arms and strokes my wet hair. "J-Jan... I love you." Is all I say before closing my eyes to sleep.

"I love you too."