I was writing in my journal and I decided to write a chapter on this subject.
School has become something I dread. I used to love it, even get excited for it. This semester, though, is awful. I'm struggling to keep my grades up, perfect my uil music, and on top of that I have to make sure I get enough sleep and remind myself to eat. I also have to think about my friendships. Or, to be more accurate, my lack of.
I eat lunch with a group of boys who are nice enough, but they don't really like me or consider me a friend. I'm just a girl with no other place to eat. I think they only keep me around because I give them my food when I feel to bad to eat. Not that I mind :P
I walk to and from school with a group of girls, who I can call my friends I think, but we are in different grades so we have much different things to talk about. I usually just walk along side them and think.
I don't have any friends in most of my classes, so I just keep quiet and try to avoid any social interactions. Seventh period I have Nova___Luna so I have that to look forward to.
I also have different teachers, and I miss my old ones. I had a great math teacher last semester. She was actually the first person to talk to me at this new school. It was a group thing where all the kids going into middle school would get together to get an idea of what it would be like. I was a scared socially awkward little kid who had just moved towns and had been bullied the last time I moved schools and I was sitting all alone. She came up to me and talked to me, gave me her room number, and told me to go to her if I ever needed some help.
That just made me feel so much better knowing I had somewhere to go, and it made it a lot easier for me. She was my first period class last semester and she was the best math teacher I have ever had. I was actually beginning to enjoy math, but I got moved out of her class this semester. Now I'm barely passing math and I understand nothing.
The days just feel really long and I get home exhausted mentally and physically. I had spring break this week but I had a lot of things to do and places to go so I didn't really get any time to relax. I'm constantly stressed out and miserable and it freaking sucks.
Praise the almighty Lord and saviour Misha Collins for fanfiction.
