Hell Above; Lashton

Chapter 36

I actually update fast, because I love seeing you guys happy. You guys mean the world to me, and I don't want anything to happen to any of you.

If anyone is having problems. Message me. I'm always here for you. I know you like to keep things to yourself, but you shouldn't.

Silence is dangerous. I'm here to help you, not to judge okay?

Luke's P.O.V

As I was lying down on my bed. Bawling my eyes out. I noticed no one has bothered to call me. Not even Ashton.

Why do I feel so fucking worthless. I feel like a fuck-up and I don't even know why Ashton is dating me.

Why does he love me. I'm such a piece of shit. And he puts up with me. Liam doesn't tolerate me and he's- was my best mate.

He will soon forget about me all over again.

My phone rang loudly making me jump. I grabbed it and answered it as calmly as I could, trying not to seem like a douche bag.

It was Ashton. He told me about his day, and asked me if I got better. I lied and said I did. He told me he had to do homework and that he loves me. I told him I loved him back and hung up quickly.

I just wanted to curl up in a ball and cry. Everything is getting worse for me and I don't even know why. But for Ashton everything is getting better.

I took out hidden beer bottles, and opened the first one with my teeth.

I drowned it down, the liquid burning my throat. I drowned another one down, and then another, and then another, and then another, and another and then two more.

I really hope I don't become an alcoholic.

"Muuuuummmm" I yelled out as I fell off my bed.

"Yeah? Oh lord! Luke! What is wrong with you!" She said as she helped me up.

"Nothing, you lady you"

"How many beers did you take?"

"Don't know. Don't care"

My vision was too blurry to even see. I didn't want to talk. I didn't want to do anything. I don't even know why I called her, I should've just stayed here so that I could die of alcohol poisoning.

"Luke this isn't okay. You could die" She cried.

"That's the point"

I heard her grab my phone and dial a number. A few moments later I heard sirens, and men stomping their way up the stairs. And I was soon put onto a stretcher. And everything else turned black.

"WHERE THE FUCK AM I?!" I yelled at a white wall. Is this what I'm going to fucking wake up to?

Everything was white. The walls. The door. The bed I was on. The sheets. My clothes.

"Is someone out there?!"

The worst part of it all, was that I wasn't even dreaming.

"Luke calm down. I'm here" Some man in a white suit said to me- a doctor.

"DONT FUCKING TELL ME TO CALM DOWN. I WILL FUCKING RIP YOUR THROAT OUT" I said as I got up and was ready to throw myself at him when he pressed a red button and two men- also dressed in white came in.

They stabbed me with some kind of needle and I was instantly chill. It wasn't the good kind of chill, it was a numb kind of chill. I couldn't feel anything.

They forced me into a straight jacket and I couldn't move my arms.

"Why is this happening to me?" I cried as I sat in a corner.

"You're becoming an alcoholic. We had to clean your stomach out because you drank almost ten two litter bottles filled with liquor. You could have died"

"Well what if I did want to die?" I spat out angrily.

He took a pen out and scribbled down notes.

"Luke I would like to ask you questions"

"I don't want to talk to you. But tell my mum to not say a word to anyone about me you hear?"

He nodded and left, the door locked behind him. I sighed and continued to cry.

I just wanted to fucking die. That's all I wanted! But no, I have to deal with this shit.

What will Ashton think of me when he finds out I'm in a mental hospital.

What will my 'friends' think.

They will all leave me and I will no longer be popular. I will be known as Psychotic Luke, the boy who thought about murdering anyone who got in his way.

Life is so cruel to anyone.

This is so stupid I should've even be here because it won't help me, it will just make matters worse to be honest.

Therapy will never help. But I might as well go along with it so I can get out of here sooner.

"I fucking hate you all" I yelled at the cameras surrounding the room from the ceiling. "If I could flip you off I would"

This was going to be hell.

-

I dunno where I'm going with this tbh. My sister went through all of this so it's inspired by her... except she wasn't a drug addict.

But this chapter is to prove that some kids can get diagnosed with depression in any way.

Parents think that we [kids] get depression because of the things we see on the internet.

But that's not it. It's because of how they raised us, and how our peers treated us.

It's really stupid that parents don't believe their children, when their children are in need of serious help.

They think our music makes us self harm and purge but no, our music actually helps us to understand that we are not alone and that there is someone out there that loves us for who we are.

Our music gives us anymore confidence than anything else.

So stop fucking judging teenagers and try to see what were going through and what were trying to get through.

And don't tell someone to kill themselves simply because of the music they hear. That's pathetic. That celebrity probably saved that persons life and there you are hating on someone's idol.

Stop. I don't like your kind.

Sorry for the long authors notes and short chapters I'm just really "fired" up. Idek.