Whispers Of Our Soul

THE MEANING OF LIFE

*read all after the arrows for meaning of life as stated above*

Hey! It's me! Who you? Yes me! I just realized I performed a little skit complete with encore musical references in my head. I have gotten just a little bit more insane, welcome to my mind!

I haven't updated it forever it feels like! I just wasn't really feeling like writing. All of my philosophical thoughts were going into my drawing.
I draw btw. I'm a pretty artsy person actually, I write (as you know,) I draw and I am pretty good at it, I can play the trumpet and some piano, and I act. I don't song though, and all my dancing is basically spastic limb movements. Yay! A summary of my talents and skills!

Okay, back to being a semi responsible and mostly mature lady. So yes, I draw. If you want to see my art, follow my account on Instagram. @heavydirtysoul_art. Yes, that is a Twenty Øne Piløts song. Yes, I am a clique artist. No, I do not only do TØP fandom stuff. I draw stuff unrelated to my husband Josh Dun. Hey! Don't look at your screen like that! Even the most sane and normal girls have crazy fandoms and insane celebrity crushes that they are actually in love with. It's our secret. Shh don't tell anyone.

But follow me, cause I am starts to do art requests. I am also selling some of the pictures you guys request, if you want something drawn, follow that account. I won't be paying you any attention if you message me on this app for a drawing, unless of course you don't have an Insta. I'm not heartless.

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Now lovely readers, get comfy because I am about to tell you a decently lengthed story that all leads to the meaning of existence and of life.

I have a friend, and that word doesn't even do what he means to me justice, who went through hell and was treated really badly throughout his school years. Everything is fine now, but he suffered from depression and he never self harmed (thank the lord cause I would've shit myself shitless if he did), but he was really depressed.
An I don't mean like just feeling down depression, this was hardcore depression an he would go weeks without talking to anyone, basically it was not a good place for him to be. But I met him last year and we really started talking this year, and we have literally become best friends, we could not be closer u less we engaged in sexual relations and I have no intention of doing so. I tell him everything and have told him everything and he has done the same with me.
I am telling you all of this because recently he started to get depressed again and then he started to fade, he shut down I guess and wouldn't answer any of my texts.
So I sent him a long ass essay thing about how much he ducking meant to me, because he is everything he thinks he isn't and he is one of the greatest people I know. And then he wrote me - long ass essay thing back.

And that message literally made my whole day and it's probably going to make my day for the next freaking year because he was so sweet and he was genuine and heartfelt and it was amazing.
I am not going to reveal anything that was said in the writing except this, he claimed my smile was the most wonderful thing in the world and I had given him a reason to live. I think, ladies and gentleman, I have found the meaning of life. When he said that I had given him a reason to live, my heart just about exploded. That is my purpose, and not to get insanely deep, but that's your purpose too. We, as humans, as friends, as beings with hearts and feelings and emotions, it is our job to make sure that our fellow humans, who also have hearts and feelings,have a reason to live. Because let me tell you, feeling like you are no longer worthy of breathe and life is the ultimate low. It means that the world has kicked you so many times that you have no will.
I don't think you can fully user stand what it means to be suicidal until you have been suicidal. And don't purposely do that just so you can understand, it is the worst possible thing in this entire universe. Do you understand how worthless you have to think of yourself to ever think you dot deserve the most simple thing of getting to breathe? You think that the world would be better without you. And it won't be. Because very life is important and useful and guess what? Everyone is worth more than they think. You are have worth, lots of it. And to think you don't is a living hell, because of you can't believe in yours led than who will right? So the whole point of existence, or one point, is to make sure that everyone's life has meaning. They already have worth, sometimes they need o be reminded of it, but thy are non with worth. What they aren't given, is a reason to live. They are given hundreds and even thousands of options they can pick reasons from, but ultimately people choose their reasons solo. And giving someone's life meaning is the closest, besides reproduction, you can get to giving someone life. Because of me, a very lovely and amazing and all around fucking great guy now has a reason to wake up and he his ass dressed and looking fairly well every morning. That right there is enough. If I never accomplish anything in my life again and grow to be a little old lady who begs for scraps on the street, I will still be happy. Because I gave meaning to someone's life.

This conversation happened on a Saturday night, I saw him today actually, and he was happy. Joyful, even, he was talking animatedly and walking around and being jumpy and bouncy and it felt wonderful because I knew I had contributed to his happiness. I felt like my body was gonna float up into the air and stay in the clouds. I loved it.

There is my story of how I came to find the meaning of life, or part of the meaning. And, I did not mean my life is fulfilled because of what I did, I still have a bunch of stuff I need to do before I call it quits, but it makes my life feel more filled. And that's pretty darn close.

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My really long story is finally over. To recap, I haven't updated in forever and I accidentally feel down some stairs to show how sorry I am :3) Follow @heavydirtysoul_art, I am selling my art and taking drawing requests. I found the meaning of life. The end.

Goodnight, good morning, good whatever time it is wherever you are;
You look lovely today. You are beautiful. You are great. You have worth.

That's all no puns,

Love,

A girl who has a very intense obsession with Twenty Øne Piløts and who probably should get immediate help because her love for them could be considered fatal for the survival of the earth and all of humanity.