At Least We Have Good Weather: A Life of Love and Loss

Chapter 21

Officially starting in February of 2005, I spent a wonderful year at Heat magazine, and it was by far the best year of my life up until that point. Despite increasing personal issues and playing catch-up financially, I gave EVERYTHING to the job. I was happy career-wise. I met so many people, made so many contacts and met the people who would shape my life.

After that year however, the reality that I needed more money played on my mind heavily.

On New Year's Day 2006, my bosses from the TV show made me an offer to come on board permanently, and while the financial offer they made me was never great, it was enough not want to turn down (plus it was more than that bucket of chicken I never got).

I always felt I owed them for giving me my start, but I had clashed with one of the bosses fairly often during my time on Project Fame, and the TV show I hosted, and I always worried that this would be magnified if I worked permanently with him.

I explained this to my editor at Heat magazine and said I didn't want to leave, but I just couldn't say no to the money. To their credit Heat magazine tried to put together a counter offer, which simply wasn't enough. With tears flowing I turned it down and handed in my resignation...

It broke my heart to leave Heat, and it's one of the biggest regrets I had in my life, but it was a necessary action to get me where I am today.

My farewell email was considered epic, and the awkward humour and honesty in which I spoke about things, was a tribute to how much I was going to miss my colleagues.

Then, I left Heat exactly one year to the day I started.

I joined the producers' company on a full-time basis in March of 2006.

The first few days were great! I was treated with nothing but respect; I had a good reputation with my co-workers because of "The Burg" and all he had accomplished. But soon enough things changed.

What followed were six of the worst months of my life.

Essentially, I had three bosses.

One, who truly believed in me, and the potential of The Burg as a character. He was someone I would work for/with him again in a heartbeat.

One, who had all my respect and while firm with me, allowed me many opportunities to shine.

The third became the man I clashed with on a near daily basis. Perhaps some justified, and some just purely ridiculous. When we got on it was great, but when we didn't, well, it wasn't.

One memory that stands out, was when I wore track pants to work. I got pulled aside and told I was being disrespectful and hadn't earned the right to wear track suit pants to work and to never do it again.

Another time I got up to go to the vending machine...my boss ran after me and told me that can't I see everyone else is plugging away working hard and I should do the same.

A third time, after a miscommunication in an email, I was dragged out into the courtyard and humiliated, sworn at and lambasted. I later got an apology. But by then I was seen as the rebel. The one guy who stood up to the powers that be. I never did this deliberately, it just sort of came with "being me".

I was eventually suspended from my TV show due to a few mistakes of allowing certain messages deemed "inappropriate" on air. Of course this was likely just a way of working me off air. It was ok though, while I loved what I did, I was at peace that I had done all I could with the show, and was happy for someone else to get the chance.

When I WAS given creative freedom, I shined, but ultimately I was held on a leash and used as an example for anyone who tried to be an individual - which I was and always will be.

After handing in my resignation (for a second time in six months), I was told that I would never make it out there without them. I knew that couldn't possibly be true.

However, during my time there, I had stayed in touch with the aforementioned Idols judge, Dave Thompson, and he had never forgot my letter that said "I will work for you one day". He called me one day and had said there was something opening up with Sony BMG that he thought I would be perfect for. Nothing, however, had been finalized, and it was more a wait and see situation.

Ironically, the exact same day I wore the tracksuit pants to work, you know, the ones I hadn't earned the right to wear, Dave asked me if I could come through for an interview. I met with him and the MD of the company. Neither of them cared that I was wearing those tracksuit pants, and after a great interview, they said they would be in touch.

I took a massive chance by quitting my job after only 6 months, but I hoped the Music Industry gig would come through. I felt in my heart it was meant to be.

Despite the problems I encountered there, I did have some great colleagues, including an old high school friend, a media contact I had met during my Heat days, a former Big Brother contestant /colleague from my Project Fame days (more on her later), and a guy named Simon with whom I became great friends and had the utmost respect for as a person and for his talents.

Simon and I bonded immediately. Our love of sports, wrestling, movies and inside jokes made my 6-month prison sentence easier to deal with. In fact, we were so similar; that Simon had become the closest thing I had had to a best friend in a very long time. I cherish my time with him, as I miss it dearly today.

We even got the chance to collaborate on a company-wide project to celebrate the TV station's 20th anniversary.

Each department was asked to submit a movie, explaining what they did and to make it as creative as possible.

Simon and I co-wrote a screenplay that was a spoof of the popular series 24 as well as a few other popular shows at the time. It was a bit of writing genius, as we ended up winning the award for "Best Script". I also personally spoofed Prison Break, as one of the scenes in our movie had me stripping down to show off a nonsensical blueprint tattooed on my body. I won an additional award for "Best Chest".

In fact, that movie is still doing the rounds on YouTube, just search for 5: The New Media

Movie.

The awards were actually handed out after I left the company, so I had to awkwardly come back to be part of the ceremony. But there was a great sense of irony in coming back to collect two awards after they told me I wouldn't make it out there without them.

My resignation was kept quiet for a while, and eventually I was told they needed the space and I was welcome to work my last month from home.

The funniest/saddest story out of all this, and I'm sure this may upset a lot of people for revealing this, but on my last Friday there, a few of my close allies and I wondered if there would be farewell drinks for me. Well, thanks to some ingenious trickery and computer hacking, we were able to find out more than we should have.

There were indeed drinks for me, except I wasn't invited. The email was sent to a few key people who would be meeting up after work, I just happened to have been excluded on that list, a final slap in the face after 6 months of regret.

So after being told that I would never make it out there without them, the very next day after being told I could work from home...I hit the big time when I started at Sony BMG Music.